I wish I had never let go those childish drawings treasure hunts, scrapbooking the random video projects I just felt proud I could call it mine young me had no worries young me smiled so wide Then came what I wished was my happy days Lived the rest of my life head down, no noise, no sound stopped trying for fear of rejection and humiliation, embarrassment fear gripped my present because of those thoughtless words Now I am just hoping time would slow down better yet, rewind reset delete so I could catch up, clambering for any ambition and passion that I let slip between my fingers because of those thoughtless judgements echoing both awake and asleep Still don't know what it is I long for I have reached adulthood with no thought while others seemed to have a future so bright as for me, a hazy and blurry path lays in front My only hope is Allah, on the prayers of times spent raising my hand and bowing my head to the ground. Perhaps then, I'll move on and find my purpose.