Her
I remember a time
When the wind blew through my hair
And the sun smiled down on me
I know that I can never go back
To laughter
Ice cream
Swings
Never go back
To that curly haired girl
With the cheeky smile
But I remember her
I remember her laugh
And babble
I remember her
I know that I can never take back
Slammed doors
Suppressed sobs
Cuts on my wrist
Never take back
The hurt I’ve seen
But I remember before
Before I watched my future fade
Made up husband replaced with wife
And the resentment I had for that
I remember her
I remember her future
Husband and kids
A smile fixed on my face
Autumn leaves drift in Victorian streets
And there’s our house
The one he grew up in
And I leaned over and kissed his lips
And it felt so good
To have such clear thoughts
Haven’t felt that for a while
But I remember it
I can feel us colliding
Remembering it all
Her hopes and fears
Her tears and laughter
I remember it all
But then I see mine
Blood and screams
Spinning out of control
And much as I’d like to go back
To her
She was that sweet ice cream
Melting in the sun
Innocence taken
By the sunshine of life
And the rain
Oh I remember her
But
She’s not here anymore
I am
But I am not just regrets
I am pieces of paper
With poetry littering the margins
A flag blowing in the wind
Showing my love
Music with a bobbing head
The ghost of a smile
Tracing my face
Her ghost
Oh I remember those as well
All those things
I am and I’ve lost
Oh I remember it
I’ve hated
I’ve loved
But I’m coming out of my memories
Out of the closet
Out of the shadow of shame
I remember
But one day I’ll forget