“this was fun,” I tell him, smiling wide as I gaze in those big brown eyes I’ve known for years, leaning into a railing bordering the trail. he’s my bestie—we’re not necessarily that close but we’re chill, you know?

he agrees, “yes it was. we should do this more often.”

we had gone for a walk in the park since finals were coming up and we both needed a break from studying. it was a nice vacation from all the work.

I look away from him and out into the blue instead. for some reason, I can never hold eye contact with him for too long. I just feel compelled to look away. but right now I can feel his eyes still lingering on my face. as I realize this, my smile fades away—it makee no sense. why would he do that? I mean, he’s met me. come on. haha. I’m just crazy.

I notice him open his mouth, but no words come out. okay then. I look back out into the trees, looking at nothing in particular but taking in everything at the same time. my mind starts to wander. I’m hungry. I should get food after this. should I ask him if he wants some, too? not like a date though. obviously. I’m way too young and too unpretty for that. he would never. no one would, haha. I laugh to myself, but it comes out almost like a cross between a scoff and a sigh.

he notices. “what?” he asks, looking at me again. I can feel it. I fight the urge to turn back to him too fast. one. two. now you can.

“nothing, just thinking,” I say, shaking my head. dang, his eyelashes are long. wait, what?

“about what?”

“y—food,” I correct myself. haha, don’t know what I was going to say before. obviously the answer was food.

“you maybe want to go get some? He asks me almost shyly, but that can’t be—he’s anything but shy.

“umm…yeah. yeah, I’d like that. I’m starved,” I reply with a nod.

“cool.”

“cool.”

“when? now?”

“two more minutes,” I answer. I want to take in the nature for one more moment. I want to take in this peaceful moment, the calm before the storm. before the math test and the politics paper and everything else.

I hear a bird and watch as it flitters over the two of us. “look!” I turn to him, but he’s not watching the bird. he’s watching me. what? haha. I’m crazy, right? and now I’m smiling too hard, stop it,

I think to myself.

“come, let’s go.” he reaches out a hand.

I loom at him for a second, puzzled. what? he’s never done that before. we don’t do that. right? or maybe…or maybe it doesn’t mean anything. it can’t mean anything. what would it mean?

I contemplate it, and ever so gently place my hand in his, our fingers gently intertwined. his palm feels warm against my cold, iron-deficient skin. I feel a sensation through my veins. it’s the warmth, right?

we start to head back, my hand in his. that’s still weird to me. we keep walking and come up to a crowd of people. it looks like a large family. we try to get through, but they’re blocking the path. he looks at me, wondering what to do.

“excuse me,” I politely ask a lady, “could we get through?”

she turns to me and replies in a warm, husky voice, “only if you kiss!”

“huh?” I’m lost. I glance at him and see that he’s turned red. haha, wait, what? kiss? kiss him? I can’t do that. he’s…no, no way! right?

“oh, we’re not—“

“kiss, kiss, kiss!” she chants as the rest of the crowd joins in. wait, she can’t be serious…right?

he pulls me closer. so we can hear each other better, since it’s loud, right?

“hey,” he says to me softly.

“hey,” I whisper back. he’s looking at me so intensely I feel like he’s staring at my soul. everything else fades away. haha, what? wait, what’s happening?

“do you…” he starts, but doesn’t finish the thought. what?

“yes?”

he tries again, but cuts himself off once more, his eyes darting away. “d-do…do you w—“

“yes?”

he takes a breath before he looks at me with those brown eyes one last time. he takes my other hand, and holds on tighter to the one he was already holding. I shiver. wait. is this what I think it is?

kiss, kiss, kiss!! they’re still chanting in the background. it can’t be…

“hey.” he says. “do you w-want to, uh, maybe, uh…”

“yes.”

“huh?”

“I said, yes.”

“but-“

“just kiss me already,” I grin uncontrollably, feeling a funny feeling in my tummy, but the good kind. the crazy kind. “kiss me, and then we can get out of here and then you can take me out to get food, and maybe, maybe kiss me again, and…” I trail off.

his mouth’s hanging open, his eyes wide. he can’t believe it. it’s adorable. he’s adorable. and crazy. but it’s okay, I’m crazy, too. this is all so crazy.