I want to be happy for you

I do

The ring on your finger

And a finger running through her hair

While you stare into her eyes

It’s great to see you happy

But I wish those eyes were mine

The only arms I ever felt truly safe in

Keep someone else warm tonight

Your smell wore off my clothes years ago

But now and then I catch a whiff

In a corner shop

And stop

Because I’ve forgotten how to breathe

I wonder what she thinks of your stories

That voice that never made me bored

I would have spent an eternity

On cold metal bleachers

Drinking in your words

As long as you would let me

You knew me _poetically_

__

In a way I thirst after

To feel again

I am tender creature

But with you I become ravenous

All I desire is to taste your lips

Your body

The moving pieces of your soul

How I would devour them

If I had not abandoned my chance

My tongue feels dry

At the thought

I could have fought harder

I often think

Would you have fought as well?

For the fire that engulfed all feeling

The one who would never leave my mind

Try as I might

You have a place cemented there

That now feels like an abandoned shrine

To a bittersweet love

I want to be happy for you

I do

But while my world collapses

You spin her in the breeze

I kick myself everyday

That I didn’t fight

To make that me