i believed in a world that existed without you. where summer enjoyed snowfall and the warm sweaters we bought together and winter brought fresh flowers and midnight adventures in your car. you had opened a door for a world I couldn’t believe in just because you said ‘hello’ exactly when i needed it. brightly painted frames and a doorknob that jolted my body every time i touched you. you were only gone four months but in my head it was nine years. you didn’t shut the door on me it was wide open the whole time but i needed to know i could exist without you. and i can. but i don’t want to.