I’m sitting at the table

Trying not to cry

Mom shoots me a look

So I drown the tears inside

I smile and say my “please” and “thank you”s

I laugh as Grandma talks about how big I’ve gotten

(she doesn’t know I’ve binged too often)

My uncle pats me on the back

The jolliest of this jolly pack

They all laugh and sing and shout

A family reunion brings joy about

I smile although I want to die

(they must never see me cry)

Mother is angry but wont let it show

At least, not until we go home

Dinner is over

I’m feeling sober

The sooner the shouts start

The sooner its over

It’s my fault really

I had it coming

Who told me to cut

on reunion morning