I sit down and tie my boots

One lace tie, Two lace tie

My mailbox is once agian full

A constant reminder of the pain I caused

A reminder of the blood on my hands

I sigh and pile the mail into my bag

I go over and light the fire pit

I slowly let my pain burn away

Or I try to, I wish it were that easy

I pile more papers in, something catches my eye

A letter, crimson red?

I reach down before the words can burn

For words are drawn to flames like moths

I yelp, slightly burned by those words

Stomping out the flames, I take the letter,

Throwing out its burned package

I feel the fear arising, a scream in my throat

I want to scream, to shout, to vomit,

but all I do is stare

I stare at those words

I let them burn my soul

I can’t cry, for all my senses are gone

I run into the house and grab my bag

I feel unsteady, the bag is heavy

But not quite as heavy as my heart

I gather supplies I might need

A compass, dried meat, some twine

I wish the twine would piece me back together

I run outside, taking a moment before killing the fire

I breath in and out, taking in its power

Drenching the flames with water,

But keeping the ones in my soul

I run as fast as the earth will let me

I run past the trees, past the trunks

The trunks that lost themselves

Past the animals that run away for me

I reach the mountain and see the cave

Terror hits my ears, a scream, a childs scream

Rain starts to pour, the world morns me

My feet hit the pathway as fast as my lunges allow

The air gets thinner, but I can’t back down

Not now, not ever

My leg cramps, but I shuffle along

The continuing screams, my heart in my ears

I feel myself getting close,

One final scream, a shot in my heart

I see the corner, my heart in my throat

But when I go to tun it, I slip,

I grip the edge of the cliff with my life,

But what I see in that cave is not my child

It’s a women, smiling like the devil

She comes to me with three drawn words

“You deserve this”

My mind falls and my body will be next

She starts to push me off the edge

But I’m quicker than she is

I grab her wrist and fling her back

She grabs my back and I scream

I feel a knife but she lets go laughing

She falls with the same smile

I pull myself up with the rest of my strength

Laying there in the rain, blood pooring out

I think about my past

The people I killed for the king

The ruined lives of families, friends

I let myself be ruined

But I have to stop what’s coming, save my child

I force myself to my feet and run

I hobble along, cluching my side

Past the trees, wilting

Past the stumps, sobbing

Past no animals, for they all hide

I thought I could make it but

I feel the heat, and see the flame

I just couldn’t run fast enough

My home was ablaze, I choke on my tears

Though my guilt caught me early,

The people’s punishment was now

I felt myslef drown in fire

I thought I could stop it

But it was too late, I fell for the trap

Like a moth to the flame