February 13th

Finally made it to California. Cross country moves are not the vibe. But at least it’s warm here. Excited to go to the beach.

February 17th

Showed up early for work today. First day at my new job. People seem nice enough.

February 30th

Finally settled in to the new apartment. Who knew going minimal would be so freeing?

March 4th

Kelsey from work invited me to meet up for drinks later with some other work friends. Told her I’d try to make it.

March 17th

Doctor visit went as expected. No news is good news. Well, it’s not worse than expected at least.

March 20th

Company is throwing a party for everyone. Karaoke. I’ll show up to that, it’s not too intimate.

April 15th

Had a hard time getting out of bed today. But still making it to work with a smile on my face.

May 7th

Kelsey made a comment about how I never go do anything with anyone after work. I just made more excuses. I don’t want to make friends right now.

May 31st

I love going to the beach. The tide rolling in and sinking my toes into the wet sand. It’s my favorite activity. And it’s peaceful to do alone.

June 15th

Management threw a party for me at work for my birthday and bought a cake and everything. I told them not to do this when I was hired, but what can I do? The cake was good. A lot of people wrote me cards.

June 26th

The doctor said it’s progressing faster. I may not see Christmas.

July 10th

I was able to switch to work from home. I don’t have to see everyone from work now. Well, more like they won’t have to see me like this.

July 30th

I’m taking a leave from work, thankfully it’s no big deal since I’ve been home this month.

August 17th

Most days I’m spending in bed now. I’m kind of lonely but it’s better this way. No one to miss me.

October 18th

Kelsey stopped by my apartment today to say hi. The look on her face said it all. She had no clue I was sick. No one did except management. I thought it would be easier this way.

November 4th

Another day with my feet in the sand. The water is cool and takes me away. It takes me to better days before all this. Better days to look forward to after all this.

November 23rd

I’m about to have my last meal. Whatever the hospital has. Better than nothing. It wasn’t a bad year here in Cali, I wish I moved here sooner. Part of me wishes I would have let people in. It was an okay life.

November 23rd

I’m full. I’m full of food. I’m full of laughter. I’m full of love. Kelsey and my coworkers stopped by and brought me cake and homemade food. The best potluck, I didn’t even have to bring anything! I wasn’t expecting this. I didn’t know anyone cared that much. I was wrong. Despite my best efforts, love found me. I’m just glad I found love. One last time. It’s gonna be okay.