“What is your problem?!” Noshua shouts, the rain beats the windshield brutually as he weaved in and out of, thankfully light, traffic. “My problem!?” My words just as infuriated, “You’re the one that’s making a big deal out of nothing!” Noshua takes a corner a little too sharp making the tires lose traction for a second. My hand reaches for the ‘Oh shit’ handle instincutally as he regained control. “Maybe next time you should tell your _partner_ not to call you over every little thought that intercepts a brain cell.” The bite in those words were like a sledge hammer on the loyalty I carried for this man. “If you would try to stay on the road and _NOT_ kill us that would be great, Noshua!” Fear and rage mixed with the remenants of the salmon and red wine that was left half consumed on the table. It was such a romantic evening, until Nathan began blowing up my phone about work. There hasn’t been a time since he started where my phone wasn’t lighting up from a call or text from him. “So you can call him back? Is that what you want, Daniela?!” He ripped into me, his rage like daggers that pierced me from within. He was seeing red, driving blind through the rain. “Nathan is the only help I have on this cold case,” fury coursed through my veins like acid, “There’s been a major break in it, and I told him it could wait till morning, but he never listens!” My voice has gone almost an octave higher trying to justify his actions. This will be his second write up for insubordination this quarter. “I told everyone at the office that I was taking time for this dinner, for this time in our marriage! Why can’t you see that I have ABSOLUTELY NO CONTROL OVER HIM?!” “MAYBE BECAUSE YOU WANT OUT OF THIS! MAYBE YOU WANT TO GET AWAY FROM ME!” The car came to a skreeching hault, my hands braced on dash preventing myself from flying into the airbag. The air becamed charged beyond reclamation. The rain continued to pummel the car, and Noshua sat breathing heavy from yelling. His voice was loud enough to make my ears ring and my heart almost stop beating. “Am I such a terrible husband to you that you would make up some tall tale just to get out of this?” It wasn’t how calm, or starightforward his words came. Not how they flow from him like a river traveling down a mountain side leading to a waterfall. It was none of that. But it was the how deep they hit within me. The agony my heart felt from hearing the love of my life think I was wanting an out. A lump takes root at the bottom of my throat trapping a cry within as the tears blurred my vision. I couldn’t see Noshua shaking through the fuzzy sight, all I saw was his head drop between his arms as he had a death grip on the steering wheel. Blinking barely helped my vision, it really didn’t help my mascara from running down my face. “Noshua…” The soft whimper of his name was like a rock shattering the stagnant silence that we shared. “I don’t want to kill us, but I have a right to know.” His arms fall to his lap, the car now in park. “What is going on between you and _Nathan_?” the venom spilled from his teeth. Just speaking his name made Noshua clench his fists till he had white knuckles. “Nothing.” It was an immediate answer. “Absolutely nothing. You are my only love, Noshua.” The cry was clawing its way up my throat, seeping through the lump. “I should have never answered that call, I ruined this night for us.” The cry made me choke on my words, the tears ran down my cheeks without warrant. “I’m so sorry for ruining our 5th year Anniversary, Noshua. I am so sorry to have planted that doubt within your heart and mind.” The sobs were coming in waves, not realizing that I felt fear from Noshua’s yelling. I attempted to make myself as small as possible, but my body wouldn’t stop trembling. “I am so sorry.”