Stop pretending

I can’t deny it anymore

It would be obvious to

Anyone

With an ounce of common sense

That I am not important to you

Why do I insist

On imagining that I am

I think about you when I’m awake

And I dream of you while I sleep

Every notification

My heart still cries out

“It might be him this time!”

But inevitably when I look

It hardly ever is.

We used to talk

All day long

About anything

And everything

I imagined

If I listened enough

I could eventually learn your soul

Then maybe you would see

How much I still love you

How absolutely I accept you

How I care so deeply for you

That sometimes it drives me mad.

But the replies started taking longer

And the responses grew shorter

You are always “so busy”

I can’t count how many days you’ve said that

We all know what that means

Because you can always make time

For the people you care about

And I need to remember~

If they wanted to,

They would.

And I need to accept

That you do not want to

And that I am not a priority to you

You are absolutely fine

Without my presence

In your life

And it is killing me to realize

So as I write this

Tears sit behind my eyes

A great sadness has wrapped my soul

In such a warm hug

And my heart feels

Like it’s beating off rhythm

But I write so I have proof

Next time I think I might be important to you

That you are absolutely okay without me

And so I must learn to be too.