Sweat

Like the sweat I’m met

With every time I’m anxious

When people ask me anything

I can hear the blood

Make ears ring

I can feel my cheeks reddening

I can feel my words leaving

My mind goes blank

And I sink until I sank

To the bottom

Of my embarrassment

I want to leave

But in that moment

I even forgot that I need to breathe

So I stop

I sweat

I’m silent

-

At least on the outside

It’s chaos on the inside

My thoughts are there

And yet they’re not where

I can reach them

Form them

Speak them

I want to speak them

And leave then

I want to talk and walk

Away

Way past my anxieties and insecurities

But instead I sweat

And I say nothing

I sweat and I sweat

Until a puddle is all that’s left

A puddle of silence that smells of sweat