March 21st, 2024

Dear Diary,

     Today was the day that the new guy came. He seems pretty nice and outgoing. He's already making friends and girls are fawning over him. I don't see what the big deal is. I mean yeah he's attractive, but get off of his back. It's only his first day here. Which was pretty shocking that the school allowed him to come with graduation right around the corner. And I'm planning on staying a loner until graduation. I can't wait to get out of this hellhole.

Sincerely,

Belle <3

————

March 22nd, 2024

Dear Diary,

     The new guy say beside me today at lunch. I guess he figured I needed some company. He introduced himself as Mateo. As if I didn't already know his name. We're literally in the same class😒. Anyways, he tried to make small talk with me but I really didn't want to be bothered. This was the only time nobody picked on me as they were all too busy stuffing their faces like a bunch of hungry dogs.

     Once he gets the hint, he'll leave me be and will sit with the popular kids or a group that wasn't as much of a loser as I am.

Sincerely,

Belle <3

———-

March 22nd, 2024

     Hi, me again (of course)

     I normally don't write again until the next day but I had to talk about it. Mateo made it his duty to make his seat be right next to mine despite him sitting next to Alice, the pretty popular girl that the teacher had assigned him to. I kept getting angry glares from her and her friends. I always do, but it's worse now that he's sitting next to me.

     He's a talker. He talks way too much and is very nosy about my business. I was giving him short, snarky remarks in hopes that he'd take the hint. But he didn't. He. Still. Talked.

     What did I do to deserve this? Can't he just leave me alone?

Belle <3

———-

March 23rd, 2024

Dear Diary,

     Thank gif it's Saturday. I really enjoyed the weekends. I mean who doesn't? But something weird happened to me just now. I was in my room reading a book before I heard my phone buzz at my desk. My phone is normally dry. The only pings I get are messages from mom and dad, or notifications from a few games or online clothing stores. I decided to check it and saw that it was an unknown number. It just simply said 'hi' with a smiley face. Not a normal emoji, but the old school emoji. I don't reply to numbers I don't recognize (as one shoukd$. And left it like that. Later on, I received another text. This time I had some details.

     It was Mateo. I don't know how he got my number but the goosebumps began to run down my entire body. I didn't even text back. Does it seem rude that u didn't? Maybe I'll ask him Monday. I don't have it in me to text him back.

Sincerely,

Belle <3

———-

March 25th, 2024

Dear Diary,

     The first thing Mateo did was ask me why I didn't text him back. I just simply told him that I didn't know what to say back and it was weird that he suddenly had my number. He seemed to understand but didn't say how he got it. And then asked me "why don't you like company?"

     It wasn't that I didn't like company. I just wasn't used to it. And I told him just that. Nobody wants to be with a loser like me. If they do, they'll end up getting outcasted too. And most people didn't like that. So they'd leave me behind. However, with Mateo, he's been pretty lucky since the girls still flock to him and guys liked hanging out with him since he's pretty athletic. Now that I think about it, he talks to everyone. Pretty much he's an extrovert. Something I'm not. I don't care to be around people and the feeling is mutual from others.

     Except Mateo.

     He asked me to not be distant towards him at least. Claiming that he really wants to get to know me.

     I don't know. I guess I'll give it a shot?

Sincerely,

Belle <3

———-

March 28th, 2024

Dear Diary,

     I think I'm slowly starting to warm up to Mateo. He sticks by me like glue. And he still talk a lot. Like A LOT a lot. I'm getting used to it now. Honestly, I enjoy listening to him talk about his interests and him being enthusiastic about mine. I normally have a hard time with warming up to people. But I think I'm having an easier time with him.

Sincerely,

Belle <3

————

April 18th, 2024

Dear Diary,

     Hello. It's been a while. I should update you one what's been going on.

     So, Mateo asked me out to prom (of course platonically) and I said yes. He's been such a good friend to me. I'm also glad that he was never made out to be an outcast like me. Everyone loves him and loves his energy. How could he become an outcast with such a bright personality anyways. He's been trying to get me out of my comfort zone and have me hang out with other people. It was rough, but I noticed that I was warming up the more I became social. Those that saw me as weird began to tell me that I turned out to be pretty cool. One guy even screaming in shock "she can take??" Yeah, it was kind of funny.

     But I think I can only feel like this and be comfortable around others is because Mateo is always by my side. Any other time, I'd stay on the sidelines. Especially if he misses a day or two at school. But others still try to make small talk and I don't push them away like I usually would. It's been interesting.

     It's almost time for graduation. I can't wait. But the only person I'll miss is Mateo.

    Thanks for letting me talk to you after so long!

Sincerely,

Belle <3

————

April 27th, 2024

Prom was the worst.

What I thought was going to be a beautiful and fun night turned out to be a disaster.

It turns out...I was just a bet.

If Mateo could get me to prom and they get the chance to dump colorful paint on me. Mateo would get a thousand dollars each from his buddies.

Everyone laughed at me when the paint fell on me.

My beautiful dress that my hardworking dad bought for me was ruined.

My beautiful hair that my mom took the time to do was ruined.

Every...everything was ruined!

I looked at Mateo in disbelief. The boy I thought was becoming my best friend held a bewildered and melancholy look. But the guys from the basketball team crowded around him. Jumping for joy and giving him pats on the back.

I hate this night.

I hate it.

I hate everyone.

But most of all...I hate Mateo

Belle

———-

May 16th, 2024

Dear Diary,

     It's finally graduation day. I'm ready to get this over with. Ever since prom, Mateo has been actively trying to talk to me. But I blocked his number, I moved my seat before it was the seniors' last day of school—-meaning a week before graduation, and made no effort to give him an ounce of my time.

     I'm so glad I'm moving out of state for college. I want nothing to do with anyone that  isn't family. Especially Mateo.

     But he stopped me when no one was around. When I looked at him, he looked so sad and defeated. He tried to explain himself but I barely made eye contact with him to acknowledge him. I wanted nothing to do with him and I made sure I told him that after his little explanation. When I said it, I could see the tears welling up in his eyes.

      "Yes, it was a bet at first. But the more I got to talk to you and know you. I began to genuinely like you. I really really like you, Belle. More than just a friend."

     I remember scoffing at him and turning away. There was no way in hell I was gonna let that bastard see me cry.

     "Tell that to another naive girl. I'm done with you. I want nothing to do with you."

      Then the ceremony became a blur. I could feel him and see him staring at me in the corner of my eye. But I gave him none of my attention. Afterwards, I told my parents I wanted to go straight home. They didn't mind. I'm sure they pieced together that I didn't want to stay longer in case Mateo tried to talk to me one more time.

I vow to never let anyone get close to me.

Never again.

I don't know if I'll ever write in this diary again. But I'm so done with this chapter in my life and I'm ready to start fresh.

Thank you for always holding my words close to your pages. I guess you’re the only thing I should’ve trusted more than some knucklehead boy.

Love,

Belle <3