**_The dreadful silence ,_**

it lingers on ,long after

you’ve been gone. I

couldn’t tell what was worse ,

the **_silence or the violence._**

Pretending I was **_dead_**,

**_Ignoring me to the sickest

depths of time._**

Or beating me down emotionally,

physically, psychologically and sexually.

**_The dreadful silence._**

I thought I was going **_insane,

_****_From all the brainwashing,

gaslighting, and torture._**

Holding us hostage in our

newly built home. You took all

the keys and phones. I just

had my close to 8th surgery .

Instead of helping me, you

starved me, and I found out

you were cheating.

But now I’m here all alone,

in this black ,hollow hole.

There’s nothing, just invisible me.

In this void of emptiness.

I turn on my tv, constantly for company.

I cut at my hair, theres not

much there anymore ,from

my obsessive tendencies.

Lack of sleep, of food, and death

threats, a single mom so sick herself.

**_The dreadful silence _*

Things are looking bleak.

Time just bleeds together _

into a river of tears, from years

Of suffering and misery.

I wish I could skate away far from here.

**_Hopelessly Hopeless_**& overthinking

everything. Even the smallest of

Things seem like major decisions for me.

**_The dreadful silence _**

I’m running around in fight

or flight ,looking like I’m

going crazy. I can’t sleep

until it’s daylight because

I have to protect my little boy.

So I’m **_stuck_** on this hamster wheel

And I can’t get off ,even when I’m

In **_excruciating_** **_pain. I’m _**so tired I’m

**_Passing out , _**but I keep fighting it.

As this **_dreadful silence _**

has become a part of me,

**_but,_** its becoming smaller and smaller

every day .I focus on the good,

and helping others.

I’m grateful and blessed for everything.

**_God has gotten me through, as always._**

I’m a **_Survivor!_**