i hear them say a girl needs a mother

but does that apply to me

does my mother make me happy?

and i know the answer to that but i try not to believe it

because my mother is the reason i cry

she is the reason i don’t sleep at night

she is the pain in my voice

and the sadness in my tears

my mother is the reason i want to get out of here

she is the reason im often burnt out

she’s the reason i go on runs

my mother is the reason why i date everyone

i don’t know what it’s like to be loved by a mom

but i know i don’t forgive you

i know that seeing little girls with there nails painted breaks my heart

because i know you never cared about me that way

i know it hurts me you don’t care that we’re apart

i know that i think about you on holidays and especially Christmas

i know i want to ask you so many questions

but i don’t know how

i know losing you wasn’t on my wish list

but i know it’s for the best

i know im not the one who needs to fix this

but i know ive always been the mother in our relationship