“ Keep going until its fully sealed.” Fiona glanced at me as I made my crochet stitching’s, finally close to closing the circular blob up.

“ Hey, you’re almost there.” She grinned again,

“ It just looks goofy.”

I couldnt hold back my laughter as she commented, yet.. I felt some sense of belonging in some time.

A common ground of understanding with my best friend.

She wont be seeing this.

“ Do tha last stitch, Alexandra-“ yet I just couldnt.

That last stitch meant my time with her help would be done.

Over.

Gone.

Diminished.

Eradicated.

I didnt want to go back to that empty feeling.

That lost feeling.

That rush of loneliness that slams into me like a brick wall.

I couldnt let her know that, because her smile alone was infectious for the mood I had come in with.

“ Make the last stitch , what are you waiting for?” She asked again.

I moved my arm away, pretending I had messed up.

I didnt want to regret telling her how empty I was.

How alone I was.

I just wanted her to be my bestfriend for a minute, to laugh with me, even though I wasnt laughing.

I knew i’d regret it if I didnt say this right now Fiona, but im so scared of change.

- Alexandra