I learnt long ago

To put on a show,

A frail mask

Of tenuous suppose.

Abandoned those dreams

Of bright technicolour,

For shadows of souls…

Moth eaten prose.

Live transposed lies

In order to keep

Familial ties

And heartbreak shy.

At what cost?

Fake smiles

Haunted heart

Blackened mind

To horror I turn

Entrust my demons

Turn out the light

Never was I.

Damned to live

In a body not mine

Conflict between-

I will never be

Able to live my truth

At risk of being cast out

Deal with tormented dysmorphia….

Acceptance be cursed

Rejoice what is expected

Fill the mould

Of someone else’s ideal.