I apologize. **Why?** I apologize for not being able to hold eye contact or finish the technique or do anything right. I apologize for the stutter I get or the wincing I randomly do or the pained smile I smile after I am defeated. **You’re being stupid. ** I apologize for being so rude and for not speaking when spoken to. I apologize for being stupid. And for thinking I blended in. I apologize because I’m so different. **You’re not. You just want attention.** **** **** I apologize for the little moments when I shake or when I close my eyes or when I breath unsteadily or when I can’t continue or when I fall. I apologize for being incapable. **Incapable?** **** **** I apologize for thinking that for once for one little moment, I could be a good different. I apologize for thinking I was right in the head. **And I apologize for taking your word for it. ** **——————** **** **** This was a kind of vent. I’ve been struggling with figuring out what’s up with my mind. I know that I have a multitude of mental illnesses or whatever you call it, but I’m so afraid to tell anyone. I know I have ADHD or ADD as well as like two other assumed things. This poem was only me talking.