“Free yourself.” “Open your eyes to the great unknown.” “Try something new.” Each day new whispers fill my ears and circle around my head clouding my thoughts and making my eyes water. I feel pounding in my head each time I hear it. It’s the same feminine voice each time. I’d like to believe it is my grandfather communicating from beyond this Earth, but my thoughts are leading me further from that. A gust of wind sends chills through my spine and leaves goosebumps on my neck leading up to my hairline. Each wind gust contains a whisper speaking of different things that all relate to each other. I hate it’s nagging voice that leaves me in fear and keeps me up at night. Sometimes I think it’s my sleep paralysis catching me in the brightest of day, chasing me around in circles until I collapse and the air is sucked out of my lungs. Or possibly it’s Satan or God trying to tell me something that I don’t know. A hint towards the future? A hint towards the past? A hint towards the present? I know nothing. All I know is this wind catches me when I stand by the edge of grassy the grassy hill, looking down into the distant water contemplating my life daily. I tried telling my therapist but she only answered with “It’s just your inner thoughts trying to tempt you.” I know it’s not, because I would never grow the type of courage to say those things even in my head. One day, while I was doing my routine of standing on the edge, the wind almost knocked me off my feet and sent chills through my spine and made my heart beat out of my chest. My ears popped and my mouth became dry. My cheeks burned red and my hands became stiff. I felt more sad today than usual— so sad, that I almost wouldn’t mind taking a false step off of the edge. I listened to it nevertheless, because one day I hope something it says makes sense, or guides me onto a greater path. Today it said, “Do it.” I have never felt as numb. There are no other words I can use to describe the more tense feeling I’ve felt, simply because any word I use wouldn’t be as great as this feeling. Those words are too mild, while my body becomes so stiff that my heart stops beating and my finger nails become blue and cold. I looked behind me, hoping to see the face of the whispering wind gust, but the wind was gone already. It has done its deed. Nothing the wind has ever said made more sense than this. The wind is my friend. The wind understands me. The wind wants me to be one with it. I obey the wind as if it were my master, my soul holder. So without a single thought more, I walk forward finally reaching my last destination.
I look up and see the constellation of stars that everyone raves about nowadays. Ever since NASA has made it clear that almost all civilians are able to fly to space, I feel conflicted and lost. I’ve always dreamed about space and how each star connects with the other. Every star out there is assigned to a particular person, and every star is compatible with the other. I have always wanted to touch a star just to feel it’s rocky material that i’ve always believed in a way it was actually soft like silk. My friends planned a space visit for Easter break. Their destination is the moon and beyond. I must admit it’s so very tempting to walk on the moon. I’ve fantasized about dancing on it. A soft twirl and a kick with the song “September” in the back, a perfect view of the solar system and the pondering of other species out there on the distant planets watching me dance on the moon better than Neil Armstrong ever could. The trend of space flight is so overgeneralized that I see less and less people walking the sidewalks of my college campus. Most travel to space and settle down there. Some of my teachers that went to space do online calls to still keep their job and pay all the way from the unknown solar systems. The idea of going to space is so extravagant to me except a part of me is telling me no, don’t go. With my interest is space, i’ve done research on every disaster. Although the Challenger, the Columbia, Apollo and more of the disastrous outcomes of space flight were more than centuries ago, I have a strong conscious not to go. I’ll have to stay on Earth and prove to future generations, myself, and the other civilizations who cannot handle change that no matter how leading space travel is, Earth was made for us to live a thrive on it.
Butterflies bloom in the belly Overtaken by joy Not much sense is made Why she feels flowers shake when she sees this boy
I guess it’s the feeling of a sunrise On a cool morning on the beach Air is replenished From the ocean waves that were oh so wise
Scattered freckles and red curly hair Makes a girl swarm with delight Oh how I wish you were there
The sun and her moon Two pieces of a puzzle Often represent the two He feels just the same swoon
A locket restricted to be touched A safe piece of treasure Could be the key to the heart The boy is the one, he was
A mother crying in her daughter’s shoulder Fed up with the treatment from their household A mother who’s given up all for her daughter And wants a small piece of gratitude back A mother who never deserved the cuts and breaks she’s received A small price she was willing to pay for her daughter A mother who held her crying daughter in her arms so many times And now a daughter who holds her crying mother in her arms A daughter who’s okay with it
The sea from the shore wave at the nearing Autumn Summer knows to enjoy the people before it ends Their laughs while they play in the water and the never ending outdoor venues bring her joy But she also knows that this is a routine And she doesn’t mind having a break from the commotion of the season
As Autumn gently sweeps in, and so does the leaves falling from the bare trees The people begin to bring out their style Autumn can’t believe how people can go from swimsuits to fancy scarves and hats in less than a month He cannot complain however Because Winter can finally take the population from Autumn’s nimble hands
Winter slowly fades in without anyone hardly noticing The chilling temperatures from Autumn makes it difficult to even remember when Winter begins Winter is fed up with people only remembering her because of Christmas, but forgets it’s still here when January comes around There needs to be a second Christmas in February, Winter concurs The flowers growing in the snowy ground but mean that Spring is finally around
Spring can agree with Winter on her brash opinions no matter how lovely Spring can be, she’s tired of being overlooked by summer Yes, it can be confusing when it’s 70 degrees in april but then 50 in may, but isn’t that what spring is about? Summer is temperatures of 80 and above, so why isn’t Spring just as important? Who doesn’t love pretty flowers and lady bugs? Spring knows not to complain whenever she things about the fact it is only a couple months until the cruel people are being watched over by summer But right now, she decides to send Summer a seasons greetings card to remind her of the few months until she is overwhelmed with people once again
-The journal entries of the seasons
Destiny is a gift given by thunder
Which is why I don’t believe such as this wonder
It was merely a coincidence when her and I were summoned for the same task
We did what we were assigned without us having to be asked
As we train to fight and surcease one’s sorrow We were so impossibly close, that a book didn’t have to be borrowed We both shared a dissatisfying goal Something that lingers deep down in our souls
We progress and progress together as one Of course we were told we couldn’t be together, but we didn’t worry about that a ton From the day she very first kissed me To when we are face to face, her getting ready to kill me I long on the thought that maybe it was destiny
an unfaceable curse that haunts me and the victim its my duty to watch as their soul floats above as one it twinkles and glows like a priceless wind in disguise, blending it with the clouds, yet still can’t hide
as i creep to take away the victim’s bottomless stare it’s my duty to take away the dark and despair don’t fancy me evil and gloomy, for i’m doing them a favor they’re joined together with loved ones, as one piece instead of a tear
one day i hope for somebody to return the favor And separate my soul from my body i long for them to watch the pieces of my soul diminish then there, will all death amongst others will finish
I long for peace and quiet from myself I’ve only ever felt sorrow and hollowed I creep around the gloomy streets Looking to find something that will defeat the somber
Something to cure my ache and solve my headache Something to restore my pain and rid the fake He has a number of options to choose of emotions Longings of things that people have failed to have stolen
Assortments of sadness, prosperity, anger, mild I spot my antidote behind the pile of fear A yellow jaw that reads ‘happiness’ is there Full of sparkles and wonders without any thunders This, is what I need right here
If I want to be a nice person And not leave an argument unsolved Do I keep my strength? Or decide to resolve?
I should not chance my luck But it seems like what I do Should I be a butterfly and fly? Or be a crow and coo?
I never really listen to myself I’m just influenced by others I go without thinking Instead of sparing a moment to ponder
I say what I’ve practiced for two seconds God, I begin to stutter I should’ve chosen the butterfly And learned to flutter
They look at me wacky Like I couldn’t have a clue They giggle and talk While I stand there like a fool
Run, run, run is what my brain tells me My mind doesn’t take me far I end up stopping against a wall I’ll make sure to think furthermore
