Sometimes it bubbles up, this emotion.
I am here.
Yet, I am still there.
A past I cannot rewrite.
The trauma is still etched across my face.
When we lock eyes, all my past doubts arise.
I’m taken a back, to my youth.
To a point before I knew my truth.
I don’t know how to be in your presence.
But I know it’s my not my fault....
Like a skunk in the night you subdued me. You took me in, all quivering sunkeness in tow.
With each passing breath I fell into you, as the freshly plowed snow.
The howling moon called our names, like fairies we frolicked with glee, as you called your nephew the sea. With each passing tree you introduced me to, me.
I’ll never forget my first time, I don’t mean to call you a hoe. But the more a...
It’s a shame how it happened, I don’t think I’ll ever forgive him, I don’t think I ever could.
How could he?! He knew how much I loved you, but couldn’t handle the terms of our relationship. My best friend, right?
Five years on and you’re still gone, but it feels like you’re here. I still feel you in everything from repotting our cherry blossom bonsai bushes to listening to our favorite song.
...
I don’t know why I care, in my mind you’re always there.
This feeling I can’t escape, glares menacingly in my face.
I try to escape the rhyme, your heart is intertwined.
A love I cannot have because of your familiar past.
I can’t explain this feeling, lacking desire for sensual healing.
What I want to find most, is all and hollowed ghost....
At times we fuss and fight.
Yet, you always endure my spite.
Regardless of the plight.
You remain steadfast at my right.
You loved me so fiercely I burned,
But there was no where to store our urn
In light of this recent spurn,
I’ve given up on my turn
Perhaps time will tell.
Yet, I still wish you all the well...
