You are gone from my physical life. A long slope down from health to death over a long period. 19 years from diagnosis and 2 years of decline from the end of Chemo to the palliative care phase in a Hospice.
You are still here emotionally and spiritually. I ‘see’ you every day. Your picture above my desk and numerous pictures on the phone. If you were here I guess you might tell me to get on with...
That basement. The only place left to look. So I take my torch and tread gently down the stairs. All I can see is a wall where the stair turns left to enter the basement. All is quiet as I begin to approach that turn in the stairs, endeavouring not to make a noise. Not a chance. The stair creaks and I hear an answering noise. Just a rustle. Rats?
I stop and listen, switching off my torch. Nothing...