“No I’m not doing this.” Jake protested.

“Just come on to the elevator Jake. You have my word you’ll comeback.” Said the elevator conductor.

“No, I’m not going to Hell. I’m already at the pearly gates. I’m not going anywhere.” The conductor sighed. “Jake, this isn’t a matter of debate. You spend one day in Hell. You spend the rest in heaven. Heaven is pointless if you have nothing to cont...