No! Why so soon? It seems like it happens earlier and earlier every year. I hate my neighbor. I hate this time of year. They are so real now. Why? It’s as if he’s still leering at me. His hollow eyes follow my every move. I know it’s a stupid fake skeleton but has he come back? Could it be him? The sun has betrayed me once again and left me exposed in the dark. I can’t hide! His shadow has found me, hiding under the covers where I pretend to sleep. Like before. Afraid he will find me. Afraid he will touch me. Will it ever end? It was supposed to stop! He wasn’t going to hurt me anymore. He didn’t move. I made sure. I made sure his eyes couldn’t haunt me anymore but even now he’s watching me.

Professor and Mrs. Davidson. Professor and Dr. Davidson. Drs. Davidson.

I do I do I do

How was your day? How many girls flirted with you today? You’re mine. All mine.

Call on me. Call me.

I have questions. I wasn’t paying attention. Will you spank me? Can I get extra credit?

Naughty. Discipline me.

Professor and Mrs. Davidson Professor and Dr. Davidson Drs. Davidson.

I’m sorry that I was too weak. I’m sorry that I failed you. I’m sorry that I couldn’t be who you needed me to be. I’m sorry that I couldn’t escape my mind. I’m sorry that I fell into my sorrow and let it suffocate me. I’m sorry. I love you. Goodbye.

I know it’s not fair to you to feel this way. I know my pain only stifles you. If only you could understand what you mean to me. You are my shining light. Without you I am darkness. I am nothing. I cease to exist. I am a void. But when I think of you, when I see you, when you are near, my soul comes to life. I find colors in my world. I am no longer darkness. I am swimming in the dark blue oceans. I am flying in the bluest skies. I smell the blooming flowers and radiate the sun they crave. All because of you. But you don’t understand what that means. Your joy is not with me. Your smile is not for me. Your happiness is not because of me. Your obligations are to me and nothing more. I tether you for selfish reasons because you give me life. I gave you life but it does not mean you belong to me. I am meant to love you and nurture you to growth and prosperity. How cruel it is to be expected to share and to release.