Growing strong is ripping through every bad thing that ruined you and looking back at it and think “I did that.” I haven’t yet grown Strong yet for my abuser still has 1/3 of his claws in my stomach and he’s dragging me to his den slowly each day but little does he know I have a knife underneath my tongue.
Her bed was almost as stiff as her. She sat there staring at the hospital ceiling while her white hair fell into her lap like snow. She blinked but never said anything. She licked her lips but never smiled. She showed teeth but didn’t bite. She was quiet but her mind was a land full of amazing words that she couldn’t let escape her mouth. She thought of her childhood how she and my grandpa use to walk to school together every morning separate then reunite that afternoon only to fight over who would get to shower first when they got home. She thought of her friends old and new The girls who would trample over her only because they never ate at home. She thought of the boys who kicked her while calling her ugly because they had to hide their sadness. She thought of how she handled these things she remembered sitting in silence. Just like me. I stared at her in her stiff silent bed I knew it was almost the end for her. I had nothing else to say so I walked away as her chapped lips trembled. I heard her say”I sure miss y'alls grandad”.
We all hide something. Secrets. That’s what we call them. Until there no longer secrets and everyone stares at you as you walk down the all. The men catcall from across the office and your boss makes eye contact with them and that’s it. The Women stare at you too but it’s worse because in there eyes you can tell they are thinking “What a disappointment to other women” And in the night you cry to yourself and blame yourself for being this way. Secrets are what hold us back.
Birth.Being born.Starting maybe it’s starting over from your old life the one you don’t remember. Life.Living going through pain,rejection enjoying the happiest that slips away just a little bit to quick. And Death.No more pain, only you.In a box while everyone living stares at you crying while you smile.
She still remembers his face and how he would caress hers and the way he kissed.She took another sip from her beer bottle. he’s gone.Its been months since he said “I won’t miss you ever.”this broke her heart into a million pieces now every time she thinks about it the tiny pieces break even more the all the beer in the world could no longer save her .The tears dripped from her eyes and into her cup that’s when she felt someone touch her arm she turned around in her stool and it was him she hugged him and he whispered in her ear”Fuck it, I love you” before stabbing her in the heart.
It was my best friend Hunter I could tell by the voice. “Hunter, why are you calling me this late in the night?”I rubbed my eyes “Don’t worry about that now I’ll tell you later just come outside to my car”he said “and be sure to run” “Why?”Hunter Hung up and I put my coat on over my pajamas which were just a white T shirt and black leggings. I put my Pink Tennis shoes back on and went outside. The night was quiet and still. I looked around to see Hunter’s Green Truck the front lights were on and I could see Hunter in the drivers seat trying to rush me. I ran to him and got in. He sped of quicker then I ever thought he could, Hunter was the type who goes super slow on the highway so that he doesn’t crash into someone so this was very strange for him. “What’s wrong....why are we going so fast?” “Shut Up!” “What?”I buckled my seat belt “I said shut up”he said again”and don’t look out the window” “Why? What’s out the window?” “It’s not human” “What?” “It’s not human” This gave me chills and my body got stiff suddenly there was a loud disturbing sound that was cross between a bears growl and a hyena laughing. “What was that!” Hunter stepped on it flinging me backwards in my seat. I looked over at Hunter’s Face and he had a bit of cold sweat running from his eyebrow. “What was that!” He didn’t answer me. We only drove.
