self hatred driven to insanity. scars & burns on the outside, a humourous comparison to the damage on the inside. institutions & psychiatric holds, do nothing to help my troubled mind. all ive ever needed is something i cannot find. discouraged, delusional & psychotic... possessed by darkness all around. no one ever cared enough to show me the light. i was not worthy. this exigent perception grew into disbelief. love was not real & even if it were, it was not meant for me. maybe im meant to suffer, for reasons unclear at the present time. maybe im a terrible person & just too heedless to be defined. ive caused heartache to the people that love me the most; contradictory: the same people who have never given me the compassion or support that i so desperately need. why spill your beans when you cant clean them up?
why have a relationship with the enemy? who are my enemies? who are my friends?
im alone now. tangled up with the realization that, my biggest enemy lives inside of me.

BREAKING NEWS: A sequence of mortifying crimes leaves an entire community devestated and terrified. Late Tuesday night a donsy of gnomes who appeared to be "possessed by evil" berraded and terrorized hundreds of winged pixies who live on Trixie Island. The gnomes, traveling at high speeds on their small automobiles, swept through the beautiful island. Leaving a once thriving and mystical community, BROKEN and in ruins after setting the forest and its inhabitants ablaze. Along with the string of arson crimes, the evil possessed gnomes then forced the fairy residents to drink POISON. The poison, illegally transported from a land far far away, is designed to slow the breathing of the consumer so much that the LUNGS ultimately collapse. 237 creatures and inhabitants of the island have lost their lives. Nearly a hundred more severely wounded. The motive is unclear and the nature of the type of entities possessed the gnomes to act so violently. This is an ongoing investigation.