A joy divides its fragile dress, With sorrow’s Sharing seam. One thread of gold, the other black, A wish, or faded dream?

We wear the gown in fields of light, Till darkness takes its chance. When Don succumbs to blackest night, We’ll cower or we’ll dance.

Until the end, we’ll surely tread, Through laughter and in tears. A battlefield of Hope and dread, For all the coming years.

With trembling bones, we face the fear, Despite the endless fight. In tattered gowns, we persevere, And face the coming night.

I reach for you in the dark Finger tips brushing I reach but yet I’m flinching away. Uncertainty poisoning my brain. The door to my mind is jammed Too afraid to let you in. Can you see the state I’m in. I’m uncertain, What if you hurt me? After knowing me, seeing every bit of me What if you’ll leave?
If I let you in
I lose control of being the person you think I am. Who am I? Will you like who I am? The person I hide? My uncertainty is choking me. It has me by the neck Holding me back from accepting your open hand.

Turn right or bear left, choice is rendered meaningless in the eyes of fate

There’s a time when your mouth opens or closes doors, When opportunities or lack therefore, hinder on the syllables that fall from your lips,

Yes……… ………No

Two simple words that hold in paralysis, all prior thought, As if saying them out loud moves mountains and splits seas.

Yes……… ………No

It’s common knowledge to me now, That the fates have a cruel way of making their presence known, On occasion they pinch my throat and force me to choose,

Yes……… ………No

It is by my hand that I dictate everything moving forward, And the outcome, no matter how bleak or bright, is what I have chosen,

Yes……… ………No

Whatever it may be that I say, I am sure the choice I make is wrong, It is always wrong,

Yes……… ………No

Tethering on the bridge of indecision, Awaiting any signs of what the right answer will be, I wait,

Yes……… ………No

Perhaps I will stay in this infinite loop always, Unable to settle, Unable to choose.

Yes……… ………No Yes……… ………No Yes……… ………No Yes……… ………No

The best thing About Changing Or rather Rearranging Or maybe Amazing yourself

is that

You will Never Truly Know Where Any bridge will Take you What Any path will Make you Or whether love will Build or Break you

You will, however Know a sort of

                             uncertain bravery

A taste to which Precious little can compare

Decisions Revisions Divisions Visions Lessons Regressions Volition Coalition Fruition Delusion Illusion Protrusion Conclusion Tessa🦋

I walk upon a winding staircase Wrought with brazen points of view Listen and I’ll surely stumble. Feeble’s he who thought he “knew”.

With awareness of naiv’ty Comes a curving of the rungs One misstep...”I’m done!”, I mumble, Nescient to my own false tongue.

“Don’t give in!”, I hear you calling, “—Lest you cause your own descent” I stagger up and grasp the railing, Glad my downfall to prevent.

As I continue up this stairway Where opinions come in scores I’ll change each stumble to a segue Sure the voice of truth is yours.

I’m uncertain, deep inside The weight of a decision I can’t decide

A thousand pieces goes by heart Everyday, I’m breaking apart

Hope has left me, gone away No matter what I do or say

I’ve shattered beyond all joy or hope I’ve let myself fall and mope

I’ve went beyond all light or love Nothing in the world can lift me above

Once I could just smile and adore But I don’t think I can anymore

Decisions, decisions, Should I go ahead or not? Stay in my comfort zone Or take the chance life has brought?

We never really know the outcome Should I do or shouldn’t I? Deciding is a shot in the dark One that can make us really cry.

The biggest fear of a decision Is not knowing what follows It can be a fantastic stroke of luck Or it can drown us in sorrows.

Should I leave my job? But what if things go wrong? Shall I leave this relationship? What if I’ll never be strong?

No way of knowing the future Things will be what they have to be Fear protects but also paralises It doesn’t really let us be free.

And isn’t doubt much worse? Let’s face the facts here. We may be afraid of the unknown But do we really want to live in fear?

One day we may look back and think “Well, at least I tried my best.” Because even when we choose wrong It’s still a burden off our chest.

And who knows, if we succeed We’ll be saying with a smile “I’m so glad I went for it Even if I hesitated for a while.”

I don’t know what I’m doing When it comes to you. Do I hold back? Do I go all in? Engage with sin? It’s a constant battle within, That I might not win. My feelings growing Stronger for you With every breath I take. Will God be happy with The choice I make? Only time will tell.