TW: passive suicidal ideation

Waking up in the morning,

Every day it’s the same

As the sun rises,

Death calls my name

It started with a whisper,

A lulliby in my ear

Saying this can all end,

You don’t have to be here

That I could be squashed,

Like a bug on a wall

That it would be such a relief,

To not be here at all

But as the day goes on,

I climb out of despair

Unintentionally distracted,

With a laugh here, a win there

But when I’m alone,

The demons come back

And I sink overwhelmed,

Into a numbness attack

Not able to move,

Or do, or think

Just wanting to flush out my thoughts,

With a stiffly poured drink

But don’t worry, these desires,

Won’t go anywhere

Because it would hurt others too much,

If I ever went there

So I just spend days picking daisies,

Plucking their petals right off

Hoping for rescue,

Because I’m too soft

I care too little,

But also way too much

My personal armor is glass,

And it breaks at the touch

So I forgot where I put them,

My fight, my drive

And now I’m totally indifferent,

About staying alive

So now I’m just existing,

Ending another long day

Knowing that tomorrow will go,

Exactly the same way

Waking up in the morning,

Every day it’s the same

As the sun rises,

Death calls my name

A/n: Not a cry for help. Just a way to a give a voice to these feelings. And anyone who feels this way should seek help. No one is alone 💜