. Only half of me

is invited to

dinner

since I told them

my truth

We keep things polite

and fun

but when they ask

the dating life

questions

they

skip

me

so they can pretend

they’re with the

straight

me

that they

love

more

that they’re more

used

to

Their silence

has been suffocating

ever since I finally

gave my true self air

I think that they worry

that if they accept

the new me

the version

that was

a trophy

will rust

beyond repair

I wish

they would realize

that avoiding

the new me

doesn’t give them

the old me back

That I’m not gone

and that

avoiding my eyes

can be more violent

than an open attack

But they won’t 

Because

for their

pride

my truth

is too much

That the queer me is

permanent

Is too sharp to touch

So yet again

at this dinner

I’ll show up

half

invited

to where I used to

feel most at home

and leave

the other half

in the car

Smiling but

bleeding quietly

wondering

if they realize

that silence

can still leave a scar