POEM STARTER
Submitted by Addy Whaley
Sorrowful
Write a poem that could have this as the title.
This is so simple. And so beautiful. Great piece!
Okay, I think that this is really great writing. And I have a few suggestions but please remember that they are just suggestions so you can completely ignore then lol.
1) When you write “stinging all my insides” maybe you can make it more vivid. Perhaps, describe the type of stinging and what it reminds you of, maybe like the stinging in your nose right before you cry.
2) “Big black hole” could be a really strong line but it's not a strong image. Maybe “a big black hole;/ like the night sky, / except the stars don't/ shine here any more./ and it creates a void/ that casts a shadow/ over me./ Pain. Sorrow.
Hope this helps! Keep writing! You're great!
