“What’s the most ridiculous thing you’ve believed?” She asked with a grin, hungry for an answer. I just smiled nervously, not knowing what to say.

“Um, I uh am not sure,” I sat anxiously and started to tap my foot repeatedly on the ground. I quickly thought up a stupid but believable answer. “Um, I, uh, used to think that monsters were under the bed, when, uh, I was a child. But I don’t anymore, just, uh, you know, back then.” I started to fidget with my hair uneasily. I lightly smiled and laughed quietly. She spread her eyes out wide and annoyingly smiled back. I knew she thought I was insane. But I mean it’s because I am, so I can’t blame her. You might wonder why I’m insane. Well instead of monsters under the bed, there are demons. Torturing me every night with their evil smiles of jagged and sharp teeth. They would kill my self esteem and watch it go down the drain. I mean at this point I’ve gotten used to the constant whispering and screaming. The constant pressure from them. The constant pressure from people who have no idea about what happens to me. The fear that surges through me no matter how far I hide under my covers. The questions like, “Why don’t you talk anymore?” And “Are you ok?”

“Oh I’m fine,” and “I’m good,” I reply with a smile, but as soon as they can’t see my face my fake happy expression stops and turns into my real face. The hurt face, with plenty of scars and open wounds. The tears that represent an untold story. When I’m not sobbing you can see a sparkle in my eyes. A sparkle that shows I’m just holding in my tears from the world. I know I’ve lost most of my friends, most of myself, and most importantly all the people that used to care about me. Emphasis on the words, “used too”. If you are worth something to someone else you will be loved but because I’ve lost myself no one thinks I’m worthy. That’s until I actually do something to prove myself. The only thing is I shouldn’t have to prove myself! I should be loved just the way I am, but nooooo, that’s not true. That won’t ever happen, because you’re worthless, Aria! The sparkle appears more than ever now these days. People used to ask, “Why do you give so many hugs?” And I would reply with, “Because you never know when you won’t be able to hug that person again.” But now they all ask, “Why don’t you hug anymore?” And I would reply with, “Because no one wants one from me anymore.” And that’s the truth. I’m just insane, and worthless. And I can’t shy away from that anymore.