dear diary
dear diary,
today was a good day I guess
not the worst that it could’ve been
definitely could’ve been better
met a few famous people
well, didn’t meet them meet them
but saw them
took pictures and videos of them
that I’m never gonna look at again anyways
posted a couple on my snap story-
not like anyone I know’s even heard of them
some random insignificant golfers
cried some
crying right now, lol
I don’t know why
well I do
but not really
it’s all kind of blurring together now
they fight, then we argue
we make up but they’re fighting again
about insignificant little things
this and that
it just makes me cry
always has
but it feels worse now
maybe it is worse
maybe I’m just weaker
I don’t know how much longer
I can hold it together
I act like I’m fine,
but I don’t even know what that means anymore
I put on a smile all day
but beneath the surface,
I’m either sad or mad
or I’m bored
or I’m thinking about him
but then that makes me sad, too
even though he makes me happy
I think
or maybe I just make that up in my mind
so I can pretend that I’m okay
just for a second
or maybe he really does make me happy
and I really am okay
just for that one insignificant second
who knows?
who cares?
I want this summer to end
it’s boring
and when it’s not boring it only makes me cry