Grasping At What?
He looks so amazing
And perfectly healthy.
I wonder what he would think of my being insane.
It makes me more interesting, doesn’t it?
More dynamic?
But if he’s perfect why would he choose someone flawed?
I have so many flaws…
I know that I don’t know that he’s perfect.
He looks happy but it’s hard to tell through a screen.
I don’t know why it even bothers me.
My dream will never come to fruition.
It’s not like I’ll ever even meet him.
So what does it matter?
Why go through this?
I think a part of me just wants to be good enough for him.
Not him in specifics,
But someone like him.
Someone that I like.
Right now that’s him.
I have a need to be liked,
A need for validation.
I’m not sure when it started,
But it’s been around for a long time.
I can’t help my crushes.
I can’t help but wonder…
Could they even like me?