Like the legend Tupac shakur, you told me dry my eyes, and keep my head up You could give advice but you couldn’t take it The days are colder and you’re not getting any older I dry my eyes and try to keep my head up Thinking back to those days when we were young, partying, laughing, getting lit up Jay said I wanna be forever young And young is where you’ll be, forever young You had just did a bid, came back a free man While we were kicking it, cooling it, we thought it was all good But freedom isn’t free after the penitentiary You got caught up and lost it, Man I never thought you’d be gone, shit I close my eyes and I try to keep my head up Ironic isnt it, you wouldn’t keep your head up And when we found you that day your head was hung, shit I can’t forget it Don’t cry dry your eyes and keep your head up I heard those words on that sunny April day, when we buried you in the onyx casket And now forever that’s where you lay, oh shit I apologize for not seeing it sooner, Cuz you were down, I didn’t know it Nightmares of lock down, you didn’t show it You kept your struggles inside, man we didn’t know shit You musta had a demon inside you, telling you how to do it- use a rope, tie around ya throat, the other end wrapped around a basement pipe, what was that like? I called downstairs and said goodbye, thinking space was what you needed an insatiable appetite- that’s what needed feeding I didn’t leave you alone, I left you with a demon, and on my way out the door I coulda swore I heard him say, “Take my hand, fly with me, I’ll show you the key to becoming free, I’ll give you all you crave and all you ever needed, I’ll keep you young thug, I’ll show you real love” You always deserved better than me, I had my own demon telling me “let him go, give him his freedom, cuz you know you ain’t got freedom” Those little blue pills had me hanging by a noose I was drowning and I wouldn’t take you down with me, I knew there was something wrong with me To leave you like that, for a little bit of dope and Jack When i left your house there was a car waiting for me Satan himself said I did the right Thing, he told me “come take a ride with me, let him be free, you’ll only Make him suffer, can’t you see? Your a slave to me, the king of opiates and good times, empty promises and worn out rhymes Come sniff this line off my dick, wait- you better not get sick, swallow your vomit while you suck this dick. Keep that head down you fuckin clown, mess around and I’ll leave you and you’ll never be found” I closed my eyes as he turned up the radio so loud I couldn’t think and I did all I could to stop from getting sick You could guess what song was on the radio, dry your eyes keep your head up That’s when I knew I fucked up I pulled myself off the demons dick, and I spit up “Go ahead leave me here, if I’m never found who would even care?” Easy as could be you took my pride from me, threw me on the side of the interstate and let me be I’m done, that’s the last time I play with the demons games, opiates and dope idiots they’re not what I need I dry my eyes keep my head up, walking hours till we could meet up I musta called your phone a thousand times and I texted you saying this life wasn’t mine, I gave it all away to get back to you and me But when I got back there was no one but me And a lifeless corpse hanging free, directly below where I stood in the kitchen, screaming your name like you were gone, when you were really directly under me A floor apart, worlds apart, what did you do, how could we part? Funny how life works out when you fall for a thug I scream, I cry, I ball my eyes and I die Inside. Cuz you’re no longer on my side My ride or die, how could you die? Dry my eyes, keep my head up Screaming at the paramedics on the phone They said I didn’t do enough, they said I shoulda cut that rope up, they begged me to do CPR My mouth was on yours only hours before, but how could I breath life into you when you were already cold, lifeless, and blue? Your eyes rolled back in your head, your tongue stuck out, man you looked so fucking scary standing there, dead. Dry my eyes keep my head up, you’ll never wake up and i can’t make this shit up Believe me when I say trust the ones you love And never get caught up chasing drugs over love Both will steal your heart only one will give you life, the other will take your life So dry your eyes keep your head up, and don’t ever look down Keep it poppin and lockin and let it be known Loves the deadliest drug Cuz pills and booze make you forget you alone But love screams so loud My love screamed so loud The night you were found Late March, 313, let it be Ten years this year your memory stays with me And don’t get it twisted take this story to heart Stay away from the demons, the drug devils that’s how it starts And dry your eyes keep your head up And we woulda never been apart. REST IN PEACE JMELL, “your Laughter lives on” 1.4.92-3.31.12 I’m sorry, my love. Lo sieto, mi amor.