today felt no different

i woke with my nervous system fully engaged

assessing the dream i had asked god

whom i do not follow

to give me while I slept

repeating a lost prayer

god

jesus

i haven’t followed you in a long time

i understand if you don’t listen

i recognize why you wouldn’t answer

the deafining cry of my thoughts

but please can you show me a sign

throw it in my face

make it obviou...

oh, like the sun, do i rise

i open my eyes and take a deep breath

jump to start

someone left the keys in the ignition.

go to work, clock in

clock out, rinse, repeat

my heart is racing

i have almost forgotten the word ambition.

oh like the sun, do i fall

into darkness once again

then rise

and jump to start.

rinsed and repeated

like the question in my head

“who is going to die today?”

an echo ...