RUN! That’s all I could think, all I could do. How long have I been going? So afraid to look behind me, I’ve forgotten what I’m running from. Darkness engulfs everything, it’s as if I’m hurtling through a black hole. I can’t seem to recall the monsters on my tail only the terror they radiate. My mind is screaming something I can’t make out over the sound of my bare feet hitting the darkness beneat...

The days were longer, and longer. Lonely, so lonely. I felt manic, the day I think that it happened. I had just cleaned the entire apartment top to bottom. Every nook explored, every cranny web free. After my exhaustive effort it must have been three days on no sleep. I do that a lot I suppose I stay awake for days at a time. I think it’s to torture myself, or maybe it’s to evade the little death ...

It wasn’t yours to take, but nevertheless you ripped it from my grasp.

You smile. You Wink. You didn’t think.

You pushed. You shoved.

You tore. You thrust. Overcome by lust.

I was small. I was young. There was tongue.

It’s okay. It’s alright. Your so tight.

Please don’t. I can’t and I won’t.

You ignore. Treat me like a whore.

You beat and I try to retreat.

I wake up alone, on a p...

The way he touched me, made me shiver.

His eyes were bright blue like a river.

His hands were large with a dirt covered hue.

I love you he said, over and over like these were the only words he knew.

I loved him hard he’s the one I was sure.

Our love it felt pure, I was sick and he was my cure.

Let me hold you he said, as he drank away his liver.

He was a taker and I was a giver.

His ...

I try to find beauty in everything. People tell me my concrete jungle will never be beautiful. They just don’t see what I do. The rain pours down, making the steel giants shimmer. The people are below my window bustle about umbrellas sprouted everywhere making a symphony of sights, a meadow of wildflowers in a place the wild has been long gone. The trees in their neat little planters, have been no...

I am dead but I’m still breathing.

Smells of lilac transport me to a different time, one when I was still alive.

The silky feel of my skin in the shower reminds me of my innocence.

Sadly all things must end.

The cold packs a punch and my mind reverberates trying to recall the time my innocence was no longer mine.

This fight it happens often.

I am clean but I am dirty.

My mind is mine but i...

I have a dark secret, one I have pushed down deep inside my soul.

I want to feel pretty but I have to stay in control.

I put on my makeup, and I fasten the wig, my girlfriends red lace, ready for the disgrace.

I pose for the selfies and I feel ashamed.

but I’m pretty, I’m beautiful, I’m in my own lane.

If she ever finds out I’m sure she will leave

if my family finds out they will heave. ...

Love is something I ponder often, is it real?

Love can mean many things to many people, but I’m talking heart pounding, unlimited happiness type of love. I burn bridges so I suppose I’ll never know if the kind of love I imagine is real or not. I’ll always continue my search, I thought I’ve loved several times but it turns out it was just life teaching me a lesson. So I’ll sit on my shitty sofa e...

I tell myself ten pills is to many

I take nine instead

I lay for eight minutes

I feel the head rush in seven

I cry for six minutes

I laugh for five

I can’t breath, I just need four minutes

I can’t think it’s only been three minutes

I cant see it’s been two minutes

I’m not here, one more moment this could’ve been solved. ...

I lay in bed a lot, it’s sorta my thing you know. Late nights staring at my phone, hoping for a slumber that isn’t coming. Bipolar has this stigma around it, this idea that we constantly change our personalities and feelings. That we are essentially crazy. I know if people could just understand the singularity of our minds, they wouldn’t judge so hard. I am living with this illness everyday. Eve...