his gorgeous green eyes, it’s like getting lost in the tides

I can’t help but feel the tension, the imaginative relationship between him and I

I need him for life, I just can’t give up this guy

They say he’s too old, he’s so mature, I’m sure he’s uninterested

Those eyes they blind me, from the boundary line they keep pointing out I can’t help but be elicited to be so interested

There she sat in the living room, on her beige and green rocking chair. My lovely mother whose lived until 99 years old and counting. My lovely mother who gave birth to my eldest sister when she was 18 and raised her alone at her aunt’s house because her mom nor the father of her child wanted to except her and her baby. My mom who graduated high school at 19 and graduated college at 25 with her master’s degree in medical science. My mom who fell in love with my father, who was the owner of the lab that she worked at until she retired. Our mom who gave birth to 3 children, Julie; the eldest, Brent; the middle child, and me; the youngest, and raised them all with the same loving and equal attention. Our mom who made sure to care for us after dad died and made sure we got everything we needed even if it meant she had to sacrifice her meals. Our mom who sat everyone down on the one cold night we came to visit, because that’s what we do every year on the day dad died. Julie, her husband, and two children; Brent, his wife, and their twin sons; me, my husband, and our three children, we all sat in the living room all cramped up and cozy, and ready to listen to what she had to say. My mom, our mom, and our children’s grandmother who told us she was ill, who told us she only had one month left to live. Our Mrs. Janice Jones whose eyes sparkled as she laughed when everyone stared and covered their mouths in disbelief. My best friend who still found it in herself to comfort the sum of us who were tearing up and holding our hearts in pain. The upcoming month was her birthday, we were planning a big celebration for her 100th year on earth, but to hear it would be her last? We were all in denial. There had to be something we could do, something that could save her. But she explained that it was too late, she explained that even if there was a solution that she would refuse it, because she’s lived long enough. She’s seen everything she’s wanted to, her children and her children’s children living happily, she said she’s lived long enough and wanted to see our dad again. We couldn’t deny her that, surely she misses him as much as we do if not more. So there we were June 15th at 11:00pm, most of the family was cuddled inside of her hospital room. Even in her last moments, she looked at us all so dearly. Each and everyone of us spent the last hour talking and reminiscing with her, telling her how much we loved her. Then once the clock struck 12:00am and it was a new day, our mom and our dearest friend took her first and last breath on her 100th birthday. Our hearts were bloated with pain, our bodies on the verge of dropping to our knees, but we held it in, we held in our tears and our screams just for a few minutes. So that she would make it to dad in peace, without looking back in worry.

My oar moving against the waves of the water, pushes me further into the vast of the ocean. I have no idea where I’m going or whether I’m leading myself towards shore or farther from it. The sky is a dark black with hues of blue and purple. The water, only a reflection of what’s above it and gleaming with moonlight, seems like a never-ending pool of mysteries. One hit by a wave or even one hit by a strong wind and I’m done for. It’s in I go to be swallowed by this fearsome embodiment. Just as I glance beside me to stick my oar in the water, I see a shadow. It’s unreal. All around me I see nothing but infinitive darkness, yet in the water I see a shadow. Immediately my brain goes in to fight or flight. What could it be? a large fish? a dolphin or shark perhaps? The shadow was not nearly as big as a shark or dolphin, yet I still considered the possibilities. I even considered the fact that I could have been hallucinating, it’s been days since I’ve had anything to drink or eat, and it’s no doubt that I was not in a sane state of mind. But, I was so sure that I saw a shadow that I decided not to go anywhere until I saw it again, just to confirm I wasn’t insane. And I did. I did in fact see the shadow once again. The shadow was lengthy yet thin, and squirmed it’s body as that of a dolphin. I tried to rack my brain of what it could possibly be but I couldn’t think of anything. Then I heard an enchantment, a melody echoing from the waters screaming “Come in! Come in!”, despite there being no words sang. With every note I heard the more inclined I felt to enter the waters. Slowly, I inched my trembling hands towards my reflection. My breath hitched at the tips of my fingers just barely brushing against the cold liquid. I sank them in just a little bit deeper and just then I felt a hand, yes a hand, drag me from my boat into the ocean. My nose filled with water and my body was hit with extreme coldness. I looked around me as I held my breath. I looked up and down, side to side, but there was no exit. And in front of me, holding my hand was me. Yes myself. I blinked a few times to ensure I wasn’t seeing things, but truly it was I. I wanted to understand, to comprehend what in the world I was experiencing, but my body had little time left. My lungs began to demand for oxygen and my brain was losing its stability. I swam up hoping that it would bring me to the surface, but I felt a grasp on my foot. I looked down to see myself staring into my eyes. I tried to shake off the grasp, tried to swim away, but I was making no progress, I couldn’t see an opening to escape. My heart rate increased and I began to panic, I wanted to save myself, but I was keeping myself from finding a solution. My eyes were full of malicious intent, like I was deliberately stopping myself from saving myself. And as I began to choke and lose vision, the last thing I saw was the smirk on my face.