Gravity is obsessed with me

It always has been but especially recently

As I walk around with weights attached to my body and mind

Like a sad magnet sucked to the ground

Heavy with pointlessness

Unable to break free

And too tired to care

The world gets smaller when you can’t move

So you close the shades and make your box your home

Glued to the couch, digging fixation holes to escape in

That allow you to explore in place

So you don’t have to notice

That your life is a train

Passing by in an unconcerned blur

I know what I need to do to get better

But the pit I’ve dug for my mind has shown me that it’s more comfortable to sit on the cold ground

And stare at dirt walls

Than to look up at stars that are billions of miles away

I will never reach

It’s brighter there but

I’m never going

It’s too far

What’s the point?

Gravity stays with me

It comforts me

It reminds me of the pointlessness

Of reaching

Especially when you’re tired

Staying put is killing me but

At least I know I am loved

By gravity