No one understands

The struggle nor the pain

The thoughts inside my brain

I’m faking it they say

But pain doesn’t mean attention

Because who really wants this

I was ok for a while

I could actually smile

Till that all crumbled down

I dont like to try on clothes

Or stare at my nose

Too long in the mirror

I was confident for a bit

But ultimately it was a skit

Because simple words shattered my glass

The dress didn’t fit

I knew it was too small

But i tried anyway, Is that so wrong?

I knew It wasnt right for my body

But pointing it out seems harsh

But you were not wrong in the slightest

I knew it was bad

I laughed as well

But man it hurt like hell

You could see right through it

Bodycon wear is not meant for curves

But I can’t help my emotional swerves

My body is changing

I know that ok

I lost some weight, I looked so great

I didnt drop 7 pounds on purpose

I was in the ER

My body was out of service

I am back in the habits

Of candy and chips

Because they taste so good on my lips

Hy hips dont like the sweets or the snacks

They beg me to put them back

So they can fit into that bodycon dress

Words were not meant to hurt

I know they were born of love

But it did hurt, though i shove it away

I know the dress didnt work

So i tried on another

Felt like a princess

I looked in the mirror

Felt great for once

Loved the fit and style

But not for long

Before the glass shattered once more

I didn’t look like a princess to anyone else

I felt more like the ugly step sister

Stripped off the dress

And back into hiding

I’m only fourteen

I should treat myself like a queen

But how can I when everyones words seem so mean

No cruelty was intended

No harm was meant to be made

My feelings were not supposed to be slain

You are all so kind

But in my mind

You don’t see the constant grind

I felt good for awhile

Should’ve stayed in the dressing room

Stayed a princess for a little but longer

But that black dress

That showed off my arms

My legs and rolls

The princess dress

That didn’t seem to beautiful

To anyone else

The white dress

That clung so tight

You could see my insides

Was meant for a laugh

I knew I did that have the body type

But pointing that out was a bit much

I don’t try on clothes

For this very reason

I will stay a princess in my own mind

I just need to straighten my crown

Pick myself off the ground

And preach strong and loud

Because at only fourteen

I am a queen

Even when words seem mean

And they were so right

It wasnt my type

And i knew all along

That bodycon dress

Tried its best

But it wasnt meant for me

That princess dress

Can make someone else

Feel so utterly blessed

For now I will sit in sweats

and sip my tea

Write poetry meant for me

Because those dresses

Were made in a mold

Of a perfcet girl

Who Does not exist

in our fractured world

Or so i belive

My crown still sits upon my head

And if you try to knock it

You will find yourselves dead

For at only fourteen

I am a queen

And no ones words feel quite as mean