You Never Asked, But…
You never asked, but I wasn’t doing well.
You never asked, but I really needed help.
The help of my best friend.
You never asked, but I needed you.
You were supposed to be there for me.
I was supposed to feel safe with you.
I wasn’t supposed to be judged for every flaw,
Insulted for every weakness.
You never asked, but you gave me one of my mind’s favorite quotes.
“Did you even eat?”
I don’t know how many times that’s replayed in my mind.
The disdain.
The disgust.
The exasperation.
Just four words told me how you felt about my problems.
You never asked, but I want you to explain.
Is skipping meals an annoyance to you?
Do you see me as a child throwing a temper tantrum?
Are you ashamed to know me?
Would you be humiliated to talk to a girl who thinks about dying?
Do you see me as a freak for hating myself?
Would it be easier for you if I died?
_Would you be embarrassed to have considered me a friend?_
Sorry! I got a little carried away.
I don’t mean that, of course.
No, I’m fine.
Our friendship is fine!
Nevermind what I said,
Let’s go sit in silence as I break inside.
You never asked, but I’m slowly dying when I try to make us work.