Jesstina Martone 🧡
Awakening artistic ability; finding oneself; surrounding the mind with tranquility ~ Jaymari3 🧡
Jesstina Martone 🧡
Awakening artistic ability; finding oneself; surrounding the mind with tranquility ~ Jaymari3 🧡
Awakening artistic ability; finding oneself; surrounding the mind with tranquility ~ Jaymari3 🧡
Awakening artistic ability; finding oneself; surrounding the mind with tranquility ~ Jaymari3 🧡
Is this the way to carry the weight of the world? I feel upside down when all I have is a need to explore.
Is this an understanding that my feet cannot touch the ground? I feel upside down when all I have is a need to be found.
Is this why I feel the legal system should be shut down? I feel upside down when I feel the judicial system should turn around.
Is this why I have so much anxiety and I can’t catch a break? I feel upside down when my mind is not consciously awake!
Is this what it feels like when blood rushes to my head? I feel upside down when I have thoughts I’m better off dead.
I’m upside down, but it’s a temporary feeling. My feet will be on solid ground when I accept what is and start healing. My wounds are deep, but it’s time I meditate for a new meaning.
Our dreams are tainted into our heads as a child; a place where time stood still and our imaginations were wild.
Between that precious time and maturity we lose ourselves along the way; searching for feelings and moments we want to stay!
Our age of maturity really comes at any age; not knowing the time or day; before we realize it, our dreams begin to fade.
Not until a time we stand still and take a look at our life; we realize that it’s our fault for our dreams to slither away casted aside; at that moment we rediscover who we are; our minds begin to take flight; we cast our attention back to the stars.
We now have the experience and the power; to conquer our dreams in the least expected hour.
Life is too short, so don’t take it for granted; a strong tiger was rediscovered and her feet are firmly planted.
Tall structures; so many people. I feel like an ant. In a hurry to get to a destination, but in reality I can’t.
Anxiety seeps in, patience is tested. Wishing last night I had rested.
So many different faces; so many different places; people don’t understand what space is.
Yellow taxis swerving through the traffic; trying to make a living. Bright lights and huge signs; a pretty busy place to live in.
Lots of sounds; can’t hear a pin hit the ground. Lost my wallet, but was never found.
Homeless begging on the corner for change; looking for a park to relax in, but none seem to be within range.
Buses stop and go; where is the destination? No one really knows!
Horns are constantly pressed; different types of music blaring, damn all this commotion is giving me such a heavy feeling.
Prostitutes walking; perverts gawking. Not a place I want to be. Someone’s talking I stop and look, but they are not talking to me.
Unfamiliar territory; not willing to settle. I’ll stick to my country ways where I can feel the warm sun hit my face and my soul always feels settled.
सहस्रं युद्धेषु विजयात्मात्मानं जितुमुत्तमम् । -Sanskrit Buddhism
It’s best to conquer oneself than win a thousand battles; eventually when you neglect oneself foolish decisions start to unravel.
Ignore the world around you and focus on the moment; stop worrying about the future, because you can’t control it; stop worrying about the past, because you are over it.
The biggest battle is the countless thoughts in your head; remind yourself that you are best alive rather than dead; remind yourself that you are strong and a golden path is laid ahead.
You have the power to become who you want; despite all the demons you’ve fought; you’ve overcame a lot! You are a beautiful person; all you have to do is give yourself a shot.
If someone else is making you feel angry or scared inside; no need to hide; just say goodbye.
In this life you have yourself; a person often neglected and sitting on the back shelf; and in this life that’s the biggest obstacle in itself.
Our youth is as bright as the morning sun and warm as summer nights. The memories are cherished for a life time, but at that moment in life, it seems to go on forever! Wanting to get older and do all the cool things grownups do; having the freedom to choose how to go about the day and when to call it a night. Being carefree and focusing on nothing but fun!
Before we know it maturity comes and we wonder to ourselves; where have the years gone? We remember the times we were carefree and never knew what death was. We remember the innocent memories of our first love and kiss. We ponder on the thought of how far we came and how long it took and we wonder why we wanted to rush. The time now seems to go so fast! So distracted by the many responsibilities with barely any time to rest. Our patients are constantly tested.
When we are children we are so self absorbed and lost in our dreams and what we think the world is and when the clock ticks that innocence disappears and replaced with caring for others, doing what we know is right and a lot of the time forgetting our dreams in the process, because what’s more important is having a roof over our head, food on our table and clothes on our back. And just like that our years fly by!
We now take the time and remember our childhood. And we recreate our dreams into reality and the rest of our life will be the best of our life, but it all starts with the many savored memories from our youth. Now we prepare for our golden years.
The breathless space between now and forever; trying so hard to keep it all together.
The shivers of the spine and shakiness of the hands, makes everything around seem so bland.
The racing thoughts and negative thinking, makes the whole world feel like it’s sinking.
The cold sweats and hot flashes are torture; looking for something comforting with lavender moisture.
The mind in fight or flight mode; the heart abruptly beating; feeling so cold; such a terrible feeling.
The sky full of stars seemed dead and cold; a place once so magical now hurt to behold.
So it seemed like the dawn of a new awakening, but when Jeremy’s eyes and mind were fully aware of his surroundings he realized he was still dreaming. He wondered how it could be so, since everything seemed so serene and real.
Jeremy’s mind plunged into a mystery ibis. He was alone and unfamiliar with the path painted before him. Suddenly he was struck with deja vu and he realized he has been to this place before. He then pinched himself to see if he was really sleeping and felt nothing. What is this strange place? He asked himself. Why does it seem like I’ve been here before?
Something suddenly rustled in the woods and he instantly felt like he was in a horror film with bystanders watching his every move. He turned to the direction he heard the sound and he seen nothing. Wait! What the hell is that? I’m freaking myself out, it must be an animal he thought to himself. But no! The dark shadow figure began to prance and it’s eyes started glowing yellow. What the hell? He begins to run, but trips and smashes his face in the pavement.
As Jeremy’s body dangled in the arms of a stranger he became quite confused as he came to. What’s going on? Who is this? Where am I? The stranger seemed to keep calm with a smile on his face. Is this guy going to kill me? Why doesn’t he have a shirt on? It’s so cold outside.
Jeremy was afraid, but at the same time he felt content. Why all these mixed emotions? Before he spoke a word to this stranger, he couldn’t help but notice the symbolic tattoos on this man’s chest. This guy was buff and surprisingly really warm, sweating even. He had long straight black hair and tan skin. Quite attractive as well!
“Where am I?” Jeremy managed to shake out. This stranger just looked at him and kept his steady pace on the same path leading towards a bright opening. “Dude, let me go!” This stranger continued on like he heard not a word from Jeremy’s mouth. Jeremy wanted to break free from this weirdos grip, but even just the thought of it was overwhelming. He smashed his face pretty good and he could taste blood in his mouth.
The surroundings became bright around them and he felt like he was in heaven. Am I dead? He instantly felt calmness. A soft voice could be heard murmuring in hymns he could not understand. The stranger knelt down gently to place Jeremy steadily on the floor. Before him was a beautiful woman with long dark wavy hair and green eyes wearing a white silhouette dress and pearl sandals. She had the same symbolic art around her neck, but not in tattoos but wrapped around in a necklace.
The woman spoke “Hello Jeremy, I’ve been searching for you which seems like forever.” Jeremy couldn’t speak for a moment he was so lost trying to put the pieces of this puzzle together. Taking in all the details of the room he was in. Beautiful architectural structures all around him stretching along the walls up to the ceiling like ivy vines. The ceiling was painted beautifully in a symbolic sun with rays of light shinning down perfectly capturing all the details in the room.
Jeremy finally spoke “who are you guys?” The woman gracefully paced herself towards him and wrapped her arms around him with such a warm embrace and started sobbing. He couldn’t help himself, but wrap his arms back around her in a very tight grip, not understanding why he felt a belonging. A feeling he’s always searched for his entire life. The woman backed away a few inches with her hands on his cheeks and a soft gaze looking into his eyes “I’m your mother.” She gestures towards the man “and this is your brother, we have been looking for you for quite some time.”
Jeremy awoke the next day. There was food on the side table next to him with some coffee and a letter addressed from his mother and father. He’s been in the hospital the last few weeks recovering from COVID. His asthma always got the best of him, but when this COVID hit it seemed like a death sentence otherwise he was quite healthy. He opened the letter first thing and it read “Dear Jeremy, since your death scare we wanted to tell you the truth.”
So many questions circulating through the mind. Searching for answers that are not easy to find. On the road to a destination that couldn’t be defined.
Mind racing, body aching, heart uncomfortably pacing.
Fears of entering into the depths of the unknown, many unanswered questions have grown.
Feeling crazy, crying like a baby unsure if anyone could save thee.
Trying to hide from something not visibly there. Being portrayed the wrong way with all the hateful stares. Does anyone care?
One day the answers have finally shone in through the light after a restless sleep at night. What a big fright, but these feelings finally feel right.
A diagnoses of Multiple Sclerosis was a big relief, despite the feelings of grief.
Finally answers to an unsolved mystery. As the light at the end of the tunnel grows brighter, the past fears become history.
A new journey with answers have been discovered and a new breath of fresh air has been uncovered.
No more confusion or delusions just pure understanding. At one point the mind took flight and is now preparing for a landing.
If I lived in the world without your love, I wouldn’t know the difference between that and lust.
It was only a dream that one day I’d find my life partner. Even though we have our ups and downs our love never falters.
You read me like a book and seen everything in life I was missing and promised me the world before we started kissing.
As we both currently have our health put to the test. We have solid proof that our love for one another is true until the day we permanently shut our eyes to rest.
A million miles I’ve traveled and mountains I’ve climbed I never thought I’d stumble on what was left to find.
If this was reversed I’d spend all eternity searching for the one true love and it’d be a never ending journey. There is no one else placed on this earth for me.
I take this love to the grave, because no one has been as brave to love a woman like me without going into a rage.
Our children see and hear everything and they know when something is wrong, so without you I don’t know how long I could be strong.
When they get older they will leave our home for their own. So let’s show them how much love lives in our home and how we never have to face the hardships of life alone!
Forever and ever until death do is part. You are my treasure and you will forever have my heart.
I’m a pj’s all day kind of woman. I’m comfortable in my own skin. I don’t have to dress up to exploit the kind of woman that’s within. I’m a stay at home mother so my patients are constantly stretched thin, but I always imagine what it’s like to be able to dress up and admire the clothes that I’m in.
I’m that mama you see at Walmart rocking some slippers with some stretchy pants, comfy shirt and a messy hair bun. My kids are all dressed up though, because at least that part of my day is unique and fun.
I live the life of a mom and I love every bit of it. I’m not worried about the clothes I wear, because I could miss every bit of this.
So, for now, I’ll rock my messy do up until my children are old enough.