I regret to inform you Began the letter stained with ink How my heart became bitter When you left me by the sink
My guilty thoughts are gone So come back please I have loved you all along So where’d your luggage go As you left you took all of your clothes Now I’m wondering if you’ll ever come back home
I am happy to inform you Began the letter stained with tears How my heart no longer fears When I left you it’s become clear
My complacent thoughts are gone So don’t go back please I had loved you all along My luggage is not here As I left I took all of my clothes Where I’m going now I’ll make my heart my home
One day my online boy friend and I made a promise that when we grew up we’d meet in person and get married if we ever found each other still single as adults. However, as we grew up our lives took different paths and we dated other people. I wonder if he still thinks about our promise from time to time; I said it as a joke honestly, because I thought he was cute, but in reality I was afraid of growing up alone and I’d rather marry my friend someone who I at least knew and grew up with. But as time changed so did he. He grew up and became a United States Marine, while I was engaged to someone else. He found me online again and asked me if I remembered my promise.
To which I did, but my feelings had changed for him and I didn’t like him like that. In fact I was astonished that he even remembered it when it was just an agreement. Something I did not take seriously. I got his hopes up and he held onto that promise for so many years willing it to come true. He kept contacting me on various social medias and by other means, so I had to block him as it became overwhelming and creepy. He took it too far or maybe I did by suggesting it, but I was a young and naive 13 year old girl seeking attention from a boy. We never met in person, but we got along well enough. Now I am engaged to my fiancé whom I wholeheartedly love and it is not my online childhood friend. We didn’t really know each other, but as I grew up I knew to not make promises that I cannot and do not intend to keep. I probably did hurt his feelings, but there should always be that boundary between online and real life as it should be.
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This story is based on fact. Never give out your personal information online. Some people will remember what you said to them for years to come. Keep your heart guarded and don’t give it away so easily!
Death is infinite, but life? Life is much harder. Finite to be exact. We all know we will die, but no one knows the exact date or time. In fact, there are a thousand reasons why we involve people in it- for the connection. But we, you and I, are more than these connections. We are assassins. Yes, we met on the job and crossed paths but you’re the only one who can do it. Who can end my life.
So, nothing is more precious than that, than you. My be all end all. My harbinger of death. I never thought you’d be the one to give me such sweet release, but those who witness my death will think less of you. A murderer. No longer a man. A monster.
And while your hands wrap around my waist, you pull me in closer. Not looking anywhere else but staring deep into my eyes so that it seems like it really is just us in the world. Perhaps if we had met sooner, I could have loved you longer and life would’ve been infinite for us. You will yourself to not press the trigger, but you can’t do it so I place my index finger on top of yours as I whisper in your ear, “Let me go.”I inhale the last bit of oxygen that I will ever take and exhale.
From your lips I hear you painfully recite the oath we knew from the moment we were trained as assassins, “He will give you death, and you will love him for it.” Wet tears flowed from your face like they had when we were little kids and I bandaged you up when you skinned your knee. Except this time it was different. This time the damage would be permanent.
My knee wasn’t hurt, but my soul was. I was burdened by constantly taking lives. My mind quickly flashed back to the assassin academy when we all first recited the oath, feeling giddy wondering who the next wealthiest person was on our list. But now, I felt liberated knowing that it was he who would be my assassin instead. I closed my eyes and repeated after him, “He will give you death, and you will love him for it.”
So apparently there is this thing called a girl code but its never really spoken about its just an innate sense of knowing when to help out another girl whether she needs extra toilet paper in the restroom or a way out with a guy- I think I could be a girls girl but I thought those things just came naturally you know, and they should right because its not like some code defines girls who grow into women who made it up and is there a guy code because if there is it’s not spoken about outloud or something.
I last saw Gus, the leader of our group try to guide three teenage boys and girls to the far leftside of the labyrinth where nobody has been before, but I never saw them come back. Did they really make it out?
I guess I should have tried harder to make them stay, but Gus kept saying he knew better than me and that he had memorized the labyrinth looking for a way out. But he’ll get what’s coming to him, like they all do. There’s monsters lurking around every corner. But they’ll never know that unless they come face to face with one. Just like they’ll never know that the only way to win is to take my place to become the Game Master.
I know something can be good When its not great Something so special Like staying up so late When we used to drive down 45 Sipping on hot tea listening to the Grape Vine Momma used to say “Now son, you’d better not grow up too fast Before you can run Take some baby steps Before your sisters grown This life ain’t over yet” Open your eyes It’s not hard to see What’s within you Is awakening within me
“I have an idea!” Rachel exclaimed as though she had never thought of an idea before.
“Why don’t we go to the movies tonight?” Rachel asked twiddling her thumbs.
“That sounds like a great idea! I’ve been so bored at home lately. But what should we watch? We haven’t seen anything in ages except for Pocahontas and the Seven Dwarves which just aired on tv.” Jason took out his cell phone from his pocket and began looking up times and shows.
“Hmmm…. how about while you look up the times, I call Freya since she went last weekend with her new boyfriend, Jay something or other? I’m sure she can recommend something just for us.”
And with that, Rachel began punching the buttons on her phone and walked into the other room for privacy.
Freya and Rachel had been best friends since college. Where one went so did the other, so it was no surprise to Jason that was who Rachel decided to call on in her time of need.
Jason wanted Freya, but not in the way he loved Rachel. He loved how Freya had funny comebacks and could laugh at his jokes never taking him serious. They were in fact, almost like sisters- the total opposites. Freya had piercing blue eyes and golden blonde hair that could make even the sun shy away, whereas Rachel’s brown eyes and brunette hair made her mysterious attitude even more alluring. She could be direct, and quite blunt when it came to her job, but she knew how to have a good time. They were best friends after all.
In fact, Freya’s name was also listed as her emergency contact right under his. She was a great judge of character for movies since she’d majored in Film. Rachel on the other hand majored in Acting where she and Jason met.
As soon as Rachel left the room he recieved a notification from Freya. He could tell she was in a hurry typing because her words were jumbled although he could make out the message.
Freya 😘 : “Does Rachul knaw wee went iut last weeknd?” 1/10/25 6:04pm read
Jason: “No just recimmend same movie 2nite. I plan on proposing” 1/10/25 6:10pm
At that precise moment, Freya came skipping in the living room.
“Isn’t it great? Freya recommended we go see The Lover’s 2! She said Jay really loved it!” She plopped down next to him on the couch.
“That’s great honey. We’ll have to get there early since it’s a popular movie.”He got up and tossed his phone back onto the couch so he could get ready for the show.
Bzzzzt. His phone vibrated like it usually did when one of his business partners wanted to get in touch with him at this hour. Usually he was on-call, but not tonight. Freya resisted the urge to take a peek.
Snooping wasn’t a good look on her. She was raised better than that, but they were planning to get married and afterall he was her fiancé. His phone buzzed again, but this time it did not stop until after the third buzz. She bit her lip and turned it over to read:
Freya 😘: I told Rachel y’all should go see Lovers 2. I loved it so I KNOW she will!” 1/10/25 7:05pm delivered
Freya 😘: “If she doesn’t marry you by the time the movie’s over, Jay- I mean Jason (obvi), then I will 😉.” 1/10/25 7:06pm delivered
Rachel looked up from his phone and met Jason’s wide-eye expression. Her blood boiled from the texts she just read. He was struggling to button up his shirt when she crossed the room and stood mere inches from his face. His Duvey cologne wafted in her direction. The smell that comforted her countless times before was now a trigger to her senses. She grimaced trying to not let his toned muscles distract her from being mad.
“So, which is it? Is your real name Jason?” she spat out the last word and wondered if he had ever told her the truth before now, “Or is it…. Jay?” She exhaled.
My shoes are muddied now with what was once a rolling green field. The last time I was here the sunshine greeted me like you did before you said you had to go to Europe. You’d said for me to imagine it like you were going on vacation. However, time has passed and I haven’t received word from you. Not even a letter or a phone call. Honestly, my legs and chest feel tighter now that you haven’t come home like you usually do. I thought for sure you’d make it back safely.
And I am not sure why I even came back to this field where we first met, but this was the place where you told me to wait for you before you received orders to ship to Okinawa, Japan for the 586th infantry battalion for the Marine Corps. That was until I recieved a knock on my door stating from an officer that you died in battle. Now instead of crying happy tears, as fate would have it the rain hides my sorrow.
Do you ever write things just to write? Even though it doesn’t make sense And you can’t tell your left from your right?
It’s like there’s warmth in the ice And your brain is thawing just to make things right
But there’s no one else there to tell you what to do So you look around for a more adultier version of you?
For instance, I have good thoughts and great intentions but my words won’t come out no matter how hard I mention them
And it’s a word salad if ever I’ve seen one Yet it’d be easier to write a book if I could only be in one
A brilliant story with a brave knight and his queen If only we were such fantastical beings
But writing isn’t that easy When your brain feels all breezy
And when there’s warmth in the ice You shouldn’t second guess yourself twice
So, author please keep going Even if your words aren’t “showing”
