i knew it would happen. i mean, come on, i’m not stupid. it’s just how life works. i am leaving. you are staying. that’s that. no more summer skies of endless smiles or the sound and smell of the shore as the waves shine only in comparison to you. no more fields of sunshine and sunflowers. no more dinners of fancy salmon and you reluctance to get used to the scent even though it’s my favorite and i order it every time. no more time i get to spend taking in all of your features. the shimmer of your eyes, the glow in your lipgloss, the warmth your checks receive when you sit and explain to me your obscure and recent hyper fixation. even the dips and curves of your nose are angelic. and i have to remember it all. because who knows when i will see you next. i will become busy. with work, with tasks that don’t seem to matter when i could be living a life right by your side. but i can’t be here. i can’t be chained to you anymore. because you will refuse to grow if i stay. it hurts. it’s such a shame. so i will sit away and hope, pray to some semblance of a god, that you are alright without me. because you need to be. i am not good for you anyways. please continue to shine, my starlight.

darling the sky is my own and i will gift it to you for you deserve it oh lovely soul i gift it all to you

the birds and the trees agree on your presence you fit right in in this place i gift it all to you

for i will fall into eternal winter one must take my lead i leave it to you as i wait out my slumber my endless summer i gift it all to you

“she felt the stake lodge it’s way into her heart. a cruel, violent feeling as the splinter bombarded the reports part of her skin. it was a gross feeling. “your dead witch!” he yelled, as he pushed the steak further. her body began to lose all feeling, lose all the moonlight it once withheld. she lay slack in his arms...” “JIWON!” “yes violeta?” jiwon peered around the door frame, holding a mug with some weird concoction in it and a stapled bundle of paper. “should i make this part more descriptive?” violeta asked, gesturing to her computer. he made his way over to her, adjusting his glasses to see better. he took a seemingly long time to scan over the small section of words before replying, “no it’s fine.” and walking away. despite his lack of evaluation, she trusted him. “‘...you foolish mortal.” a voice said. the man looked down at the woman’s corpse, knowing that it couldn’t be her. she just died. it can’t be. but that didn’t stop her from returning to the land of the conscious. her head leaned back up and her eyes meet his, her own blood splattered delicately on her face. she smiled. “vampires don’t die that easy.” she took the stake out of her now healing flesh and stabbed it into his. he would not get the privilege of dying painlessly. he didn’t deserve it.” violeta then closed her computer, deciding that that was enough writing for today. she was sure the publishers were gonna like this book. they liked the last one fair enough. who knew that using your own life experience as an immortal would make such good money?

as jeremiah opens the door to his apartment, he is meet with the worst thing imaginable. the screams of the damned, the prances of devils, a hell fire to reign for all eternity. “why the fuck is there a bird in here?” the two, three, agents of chaos causing this public nuisance were none other than his roommates, micheal and matt. two peas in a pod who practically share two and half brain cells on a good day. matt, the smaller of the two, was standing on a chair holding a spatula and cowering in fear as a pigeon, yes a fucking pigeon, swooped over his head. like he was trying to inspect wether it would be a proper nest. micheal was to the right of him, hold his phone and eating this shit up. he stands next to the kitchen, which currently has a pot over boiling and some sort of now indescribable dish burning. even though jeremiah had entered, the two failed to notice. matt continued to scream. “BRO GET IT AWAY FROM ME!” he let out a scream in agony as he swatted the bird away from his precious locks. “oh my god chill. this is good content. you could become a meme.” “oh HELL NO YOU FUCKER.” “do you want my help?” jeremiah asked tentatively. he didn’t want to distracted matt. the last thing this group needed was to be kicked out because they let a bird loose in the apartment complex. “oh jeremiah, my savior!” cried matt “you must save me from this wretched creature!” “you talking about micheal or the bird?” camera man micheal flipped him off silently but still got it in view of the camera. “THE BIRD OBVIOUSLY!” the bird made another swipe at his curls, it talons grazing his head. “ok, ok, i got you.” jeremiah reached up onto the chair matt was standing on and soothed the bird. he took it into his arms despite its anger. but it subsided as it was let out the open window. matt and micheal were now on either side of him as he stood there. “how do you do that man?” matt asked in amazement as he touched his head, checking to see if his tediously styled hair was still where it should be. “yeah man, you could have decided to be a vet or some shit with that power of yours.” micheal commented. “what can i say? i’m the mediator of the group.”

“youre doing a great job, why are you mad?” “i don’t think i’m doing a great job.” “but you are though.” “it doesn’t matter, i’m going to find a way to beat myself up over it.” “but why?” “because! i’ve been at this for a year and a half! i shouldn’t be making mistakes! i’m supposed to be good at this now. but here i am.” “progress isn’t linear, it’s ok you aren’t getting it perfect.” “but that doesn’t just make the feeling go away! you are already good at it and so is everyone else on the fucking planet. except me. if i was normal maybe i would have gotten it faster. but i’m...stupid.” “stop, you aren’t.” “oh wow, i magically feel better.” “you are such a smart girl and you should be mad at yourself like this.” “don’t think i am something i am not.” “you don’t believe that.” “yes i do. i believe it so much that it hurts.” “why, you have some many people who love you and think so highly of you.” “i...”

ha, i’ve made it. the world of my dreams. how perfect. i can see everything i wanted to. oh look at it! the castle, the same warm earth color with the stain glass windows that tell the story of persephone and hades. the gates grand spears of rot iron and gold, an entrance for for a king. i will enter that door, those gates. the gravel path made of stones that sparkle so bright that they compete with the likeness of stars. the little pond that sits right inside the gates is magnificent as i made it to be. two small angles perch up on the sides of a shaft that’s sprays water as if the the heavens weep. small coins can be seen at the bottom, wishes children made one time long before. i hoped they came true. the doors, they open for me as i walk toward them. of course they would but the gesture was still so welcoming. because i belonged here. in the world i made for myself. i see the hallways, beautifully decorated with crown molding and gigantic windows to see into the skies. the scent of wood and lavender excites me. it was such a small detail but it all the difference. but my safe haven was missing one simple thing. somewhere to share it with. it seems like i still need some work.

you remind me of the summer it’s a bummer you had to leave but i guess you have something better to do i think i should too

moving on to better things the weather changing among them i let it come and go in waves it’s true form never shows

so i’ll stay here in this season of eternity waiting to find a reason to be here now that you have left all alone and i long to not feel small

“your going to have quite a bit of trouble getting out of this one.” the police officer who’s name i couldn’t remember stated as he flipped through my files. “ok i know i’ve been here more times than i can count but this isn’t me.” “deviants are always unpredictable.” “maybe who just haven’t meet a law breaker with style.” “are you trying to get fresh with me?” “oh, i wouldn’t dream of it.” i fell back into my chair after leaning forward, trying to show to this imbecile that he’s being just that. “look, i wasn’t there at the time. i was at work. you can go check the cameras there if you want but i’m innocent.” “what about your friend?” “you’re not getting that answer out of me. i’m not snitch.” “of course you’re not.” he slammed the case file down on the metal table, a soft thud created by the sheer weight of it. “i don’t know what else to say.” i wanted to use his name to try and win some sympathy but i didn’t know it. all of these bastards look the same. no one is going to believe me, no matter what i say. because that’s how this works. the show doesn’t surprise me anymore, despite how many times i’ve watched it. how boring. “i wasn’t involved in this. i don’t do this kind of work.” “but he’s your friend, i’ve seen you two together.” “that means shit. he has plenty of other friends beside me to commit crime with. just leave me out of this.” “why won’t you just confess? why do you have to cover for him?” and i couldn’t answer him.

well, serves him right. that’s what he gets for constantly being obsessed with the things only he believes are real. but despite this, i put on my jacket to find him. who else is going to do?sporting an outfit proper for the shadows, the alleys become my roadways.

1. an alley is an ideal kidnapping location. the clunk of my boots refuses to quite as i step in every puddle the concrete has left me. my heart won’t listen to me. i am not scared. he could never be, right? nothing ever happens here. besides, what would a kidnapper want with my brother anyways? have a buddy to play genshin with? my brain waves away the thought.
2. never assume you are invincible. has it gotten darker? well yeah, as it gets later it gets darker. has it ever been this dark? the allies are barren, not even the rustling of cats in garbage cans can be heard. that seem unusual. no, no, it’s fine. i am not turning this into anything. it’s nothing. splash. the sounds of footsteps. a cat, a homeless person, a raccoon, anything. anything but what i’m thinking. it stops, the noise stops. i let a breath escape me. shink. a metallic sound, how horrid. 3)never turn around. forgive me brother, but i have broken every rule you have live by. turns out your right. cocky bastard.

As Eleanor Elise lay in the cool grass of November, the world is looking for her. Well, her world at least. “Where is she?” He would ask, snarling his teeth and demanding an answer because the last one he got wasn’t what he wanted to hear. But what was he to do? He couldn’t just make things magically go his way. Not in his own personal purgatory. Days, weeks, months stretch by and the knowers of Eleanor Elise dwindle down and down and down. Now only he looks, only he searches. God he wishes to see her again, feel her underneath the clauses of his hands. She was his and he hers. And now he has no one but himself. So he wanders the Earth, searching for his long lost lover for all time. Maybe one day, he will reach that field. Where the grass is the greenest and the sky is the widest and where she is. He would lay by her side, not even parting in the death that would soon take him. Eleanor Elise and her lover.