Is it better to lose something
Or to have never had it
He used to be sweet
Doting
I believed he was my only
I sit here
Cup in hand
He calls me bland
The late nights
Lack of affection
When did I take such a misguided direction?
It started small
We began to brawl
And then he took a call
He stiffened
His demeanour changed
When did I lose what I thought was my endgame
He returned
He smelt d...
One and then the other
You take one
you take another
You skip one
You skip two
Is this really what I have to do?
To be loved
To be worthy
Itâs quite absurd****
****
**Does a lack of me equal worth?**
Deceit is your sustenance now
Are you convincing them or yourself?
You need some help
It tells me
Youâre not enough
Thats too much
Please just hurry up
Itâs a cycle
A never ending wheel
Youâ...
Shall I let you in on a secret?
I know you
You donât know me
But you will
I weave myself around your world
The shadows you doubt yourself for seeing
Veering around the corner
Teasing
Observing your most intimate moments
Your most secretive
Your most mischievous
Ha!
Did you think nobody would find out?
I hear the thoughts you bury deep
Immoral
Wrong
Itâs okay, Iâm not one to judge
So sit ti...
To resist is to be disciplined
But what if I have none
No self control, no restraint
At what point does one admit defeat
Do I give in and give up
Sick of the edge
The edge of something that could have been
No self control, no restraint
Again?, I think, really?
How could I be so gluttonous
Do I think that ill of myself?
This wonât rhyme
These words arenât pretty
Uncorforming
No pattern
They mirr...
Snow descends gently, each flake melting as it touches my flushed skin. My shoes squelch through the slush on my driveway. I'm about to twist my key in the lock when the clamorous screech of metal halts me.
My skin prickles with goosebumps.
What the hell was that?
I take a look around the street. Iâm unable to get a full glimpse, the only source of light being the sole street lamp.
Not now. Not t...
I havenât moved.
Iâm frozen in his words, burnt by his presence.
I havenât moved from this spot for five minutes since he uttered those words.
Those treacherous sinful words.
Fuck send me to the depths, if it means I can give up and give in to him.
He shouldnât be this way. He shouldnât be able to crawl beneath my skin like this. I've always been level-headed in the most testing situations. This ...
âYou have stolen from me. You have deprived me of a happy existence. Do you understand what that felt like? To have your vulnerability ripped from you, your innocence stolen. What was it that went through your mind? Was it that, âSheâs young, naive, defenceless?â I bet thatâs what you thought.
ââPray for me to sink my teeth intoâ. What did I do wrong? Were my shorts too short? Were my pigtails to...
My body knows no bounds, no limits. I no longer feel exhaustion or fatigue; I sprint relentlessly through the tresses of trees.
Each crunch of my steps is now a drum in my ears.
I twist and turn as my legs carry me rapidly throughout the forest. They must know where I am. They are everywhere. Watching. Waiting.
I haven't just crossed a line tonight.
I have devoured it.
That poor girl. How cou...
The sound of ticking forces me to pause.
âWhat the fuck is that?â I whisper shout to the man beside me, whipping my head to every corner of Rossisâ office. Iâm usually calm in the worst of situations but nothing about that noise paired with the rossisâs reputation calms me.
âI thought my presence was useless?â He smirks, watching me dart around the room to locate the source of the noise, overtu...
âPerfect! Beautiful as ever Val!â I stated aloud, what? A girlâs gotta love herself.
I retrieved my thigh holster, ensuring all straps were tightly fastened as I slipped the knife into its allotted space. The cool metal chilled me, resulting in goosebumps, it had been a while. But time away would do nothing to deter me from completing my task tonight. After I gave my appearance a once over, I rehe...