I stare at my scarred wrist. It’s bright pink, almost like a bracelet that’s been carved deep into my skin. If Davian isn’t real . . . If he’s just in my mind. Then why can’t I talk to him about this? I’ve been able to talk to him about everything and I’ve never been able to say that about anyone in my life.

But Davian . . . He’s this huge kind of different that makes me question everything in l...

New hopes are coming

Old hopes are crumbling

Will I become better?

Will I become smarter?

Will I show change?

Will I (finally) become taller?

Probably not

That’s what I feel a lot

New questions are arising

Old questions are ongoing

Will we finally stop isolating?

Will a mask stop fogging my vision?

Will the flights stop being cancelled?

Or will more variants leave us broken?

New responsibili...

You and me

It’s just confusing

I don’t understand if you want to

Or if you don’t want

Please just give me a hint

It’s always back and forth

Do love me

Or do you hate me

Every day for a year

I’ve been doing this

I’m tired

Really tired

Please tell me

Or I’ll let go

...

I get up, make sure Riley is still alive. He is, so I walked down stairs, trying and failing to not trip on one of the other cats. They are lucky they are cute! I feed the brothers their food, and head up stairs with Riley’s special food. I make sure he eats it all, and then I inject him with insulin.

“Everyday for a year I’ve been doing this,” I tell my lil pain in the butt cat. “And you ...

I rinse my hands. Cold water washes away dust and fills the cracks in my dry palms. If I could lie in that pool of water that I hold, I would never leave.

“Every day for a year I’ve been doing this,” I say to myself in the mirror, “and every day for the next year you will continue.” What have I been doing? I have been surviving.

I had to draw a line. I am not a piece of clay that can be manhan...

Every day for a year I’ve been doing this. This job seems to be a never ending pit of just... nothingness.

...

SNAP. Day over. SNAP. Day over. SNAP. Day over.

I’ve seen people do it. Make videos, millions of hits. When you watch them, you see the disease named Age taking over them, consuming their likeliness.

But it’s mesmerising. Seeing a change from every photo. And yet, I questioned ‘why don’t I do it’

So I did.

217 selfies in, and I know I have a way to go but to see a change in my face from even a...

The bright red autumn leaves on the ground marked my path like a trail of blood through the graveyard. Everyday for a year I had walked this path.

Past the chipped tombstones and cold stone angles. Past the old groundskeeper who looked at me with pity in his eyes, right to the beautiful grey tombstone near the oak tree. Sighing I stopped in front of it. I had no more tears left to cry but I had p...

If you take every day in the past year, and then multiply it by 5, you will get the amount of days that I have hated myself. But like Carl Sagan said, to make an apple pie, first you have to create the entire world. To create love first you have to be created. Love yourself. ...