I stop looking-

You haunt the edge of my vision.

I turn toward you-

You start to disappear.

I take a step forward-

You go hazy.

I reach out-

You crumble to dust.

I fall to the ground, lonelier, emptier than ever before-

You’re always just out of reach…

I thought of you again today.

It’s more than thinking, though.

I swear you were right there.

I could feel your arms around me.

I could hear your comforting voice.

I could see your playful smile.

You were _right there._

__

And then you weren’t.

The world fades back into view,

And you slip away.

Always just out of reach.

Sometimes I wish your ghost would leave me alone.

Sometimes it’s the only thing I cling to.

Though, how can your ghost haunt me when I’ve never met you?

When I don’t know your name?

How can I see your face when I don’t know what color your eyes are?

What color your hair is?

Most ghosts chase.

They hunt you down,

Force you to run _away_.

But not you.

No, you pull me _forward_.

Are we dancing? Are you spinning me toward you, twirling me into your arms?

Are we running? Are you leading me into a field, holding my hand in invitation?

I don’t know.

I don’t know where we are.

I don’t know who you are.

I’m losing who _I_ am.

But I _know_ you’re out there.

You have to be.

I know you’re somewhere out there,

Longing for me like I long for you.

Chasing me like I chase the specter of you.

Searching for me like I search for you.

I know that someday you’ll find me.

I just hope I can wait that long.