i have prepared for this. i’m ready. i wore my perfectly pressed, easy-to-move-in, navy blue pantsuit for this moment. i ate a good breakfast and only had one cup of coffee. i freshened up with a mint and have been sipping water just enough so that i don’t have to pee but my throat isn’t dry. i am ready.

i stand up from my chair in the university library and make my way to the fourth floor, the ...

i’m drowning. i can’t take in a breath, water is filling my lungs. i feel trapped my body tense, shaking.

suddenly everything goes black.

minutes later or at least i think it’s minuets. my eyes open i see the face of a man. i blink, he looks like a paramedic. moving my eyes, i see my sister slumped in the corner of my parents’ kitchen mascara running down her face. turning my head i see the bl...

stay focused.

head up. pointe your toes.

find your line.

drive your heels. again.

head up. pointe your toes.

straighten your arms.

drive your heels. again.

practice makes perfect.

straighten your arms.

hit your t. lever out.

practice makes perfect.

chin up. eyes up. be more graceful.

again and again, my coach always harping on the details. i know i’ll be glad when i get the gold, b...

finishing the dishes, i dry off my hands grabbing my wedding bands off the hook my husband screwed into the wall when i complained i didn’t have a place to put them when i did the dishes. he always cooked while i wrangled the kids to get ready for bed and then we’d switch, him helping them brush their teeth and me cleaning the kitchen. looking down at my hands i center my wedding bands and head th...

i’m not going down without a fight. the ties around my wrist are are so tight i can feel my pulse thrashing against the restraint. there’s a bag over my head keeping me from seeing where we’re going, but they didn’t gag me. i scream so loudly it feels like my vocal cords are shredding, hoping desperately for someone to hear me. they must not be worried that i’ll be heard, the thought momentarily s...

the house used to dance along with us, the story it told:

- kitchen lights sparking to full of promise for the next new dish

- whispers and excited giggles flowing out of the bedroom

- a living room couch heavy with naps and cuddles

- clothing littering the laundry room dirty from adventures

but now the house lies dormant, no song to be heard, a robotic repeative dance in its place:

- wake up

- ...