Skinny jeans

Water bottles full of vodka

Playing frisbee in the park

Buying weed off some random kid

Cans and cans of Peace teas

Safeways Chinese food

Wearing Tom’s

Drawing on each other

Driving around, blasting music

Boxes and boxes of hair dye in almost every shade

Sitting around in the mall with hardly any money

Skateboards and group sing- a-longs on the concrete

Smoking in the parkin...

Touch

Hold

Hold myself to feel anything

To feel as if someone else is here

I miss the days when someone was there

Near me

With me

The graze of a hand

On my shoulder

On the small of my back

Fingers intertwined

I’m dying for it all

To feel again

To feel the desire

To be wanted by another

Even if for a small fraction of a second

But things have changed

I’m like an animal

Or a child

D...

A chance meeting

Again

The abrupt pass of each other in the crowd

I know that face so well

I think I could draw it from memory

You look at me with a pause

Probably just shock

As if you’ve been punched in the gut

Or maybe that’s just how it feels for me

With a tiny spark in your eyes

As if to say

There you are

The plesantries are made

The how are you’s

The casual I’m good’s

Then silen...

That’s all that’s left

Of our story

Put on hold by our actions

By our fears

By our inadequacies

How asinine of us

To let it come to this

But I can no longer live the lie with you

To continue with nothing

But gentle grazes and empty promises

Of late night calls that leave me longing for your hands on me

Yearning in anguish for you and I to be finally connected as one in my bed

I can no long...

I refuse

I object

I will not allow it

Even after all of this

When the flames settle

When our demons go back to there resting place within ourselves

I never let words that I would regret later pass my lips

I didnt spit venom this time

I walked away

Because all of things I felt for you

I couldnt unravel

Not after your reaction

Not at that time

Maybe not even now

But the one thing I kno...

A tiny blue plus sign

Hands begin to shake

I slide down onto the floor

Sit in shock

This cant be right

But the math does add up

Oh

My

God

Mind racing

Realizing I have to tell him

Pull myself up to stand

Get a grip

Wait until he comes home

Break the news

After hours of laying on the couch in silence

Hearing the lock turn in the door

My stomach drops

Either that or its nausea

A gleam in...

A simple knock at the door

Fear invades me

Then shock

Open the door

All i see is those blue eyes

Sheepishly looking at me

He walks in

Not much passes from my lips

But surprisingly a lot from his

Just let me say what i need to say

I know that ive been a total ass

I blink and keep listening

I just

I’m sorry about how I reacted

He pauses

Hes getting scared again

I was terrified when yo...

Falling feels like flying until the moment that you land

Because when you do land

Everything hits you

A rude awakening

Makes things quite clear

After all the euphoria

The feeling of being on cloud nine

When the reality kicks back in

You chase that feeling forever...

I am not a toy to be used

I am a woman

With complexities

Bigger then you can even fathom

Feelings

Wants

Desires

Needs

All I did was find you

In this fish bowl of a world

Then I fell

So hard

So completely enveloped with you

With your soul

With all that you are

It washed over me

So secretively

So swift

Now here I stand

Hands covered in blood

From the aftermath

How you held my hands...

It’s the same dream every night

Standing in a dark empty room

Just you and I

I cant see your face

But I know it’s you

I feel it in my bones

I know in my gut

Regardless of the shadow that surrounds the room

Just simple conversation

Things we used to speak of

The essence of you feels almost real

As if I’m lucid dreaming

The feeling of your soul

The familiar feeling of home

But then I wa...