She can’t help but collapse with the stress of the news she received earlier that day. She sits on her own with her knees to her chest and her face in her hands. She almost cries before she notices herself, its at this moment she stands back up to continue her walk home. She polices herself for the whole walk to avoid thinking about ‘it’. She gets so frustrated with herself and digs her fingernails into her hand. When she realises what she is doing she puts up her hood and walks faster in shame. She could swear to you that this walk is infinite today. This is her limbo, her punishment. An endless self inflicted torture of don’t do this or don’t do that. She tries not to think about it but it creeps into her mind again. This time she closes and open her eyes. When her eyes are closed, she is back on the floor, with her head in her hands and her knees at her chest. When she opens her eyes again, it creeps into her mind. She walks faster. She cannot fall to the floor again. She pities herself, her grip tightens on her hands again. She tries to let go but she can’t, she picks up her pace again. This time she lets go and just runs. She runs all the way home. When she finally gets there she gets out her key. She is filled with a mix of relief and panic. She is relieved that she is home and can face her problem, but truly facing it scares her. Frustratedly, she tries to fiddle the key in. Tears well at her eyes as she misses repeatedly. Her grip loosens as she falls to the floor once again. She sits there, just outside her front door, knees to her chest, face in her hands, crying.
‘How about a date?’ I die a little inside, I’d hoped you didn’t have feelings, That I can’t reciprocate.
I should have noticed before, And put a stop to it then. But I have been too scared, that i might lose my best friend.
You sit there wide eyed, I suppose expecting a ‘Yes’, Your smile turns to a frown, as I confess.
I don’t love you my dear, My heart belongs to someone else. She is my whole world, And I want nothing else.
It’s in this moment I sympathise, with your situation. Because she doesn’t love me either. It’s the most devastating sensation.
I detest how fate works like that, Both of our loves unrequited. You deserve someone who loves you. I’m sorry my heart is not like-minded.
The kids gaze past the trees. They gawk the gloomy dark dwelling. They progress toward, But Timmy digresses.
“Please, don’t go there, There’s ghosts. Don’t disrupt their dwelling, Turn back.”
Don’t be dejected, Don’t be timid, They know panic, They detect terror.
Timmy goes back. The big kids proceed. They barge the door, but don’t delay departure- -because the ghosts bellow; “Kill! Bludgeon! Batter!”
I sit at the end of your bed, you have already left, but you gifted me your journal, with your next clue.
It reads ‘i love you, come find me’, with some coordinates, and your name signed too.
I leave your apartment, and drive to your new secret place, It’s a bench by the coast, with a note tied to it- a new chase.
The note reads: ‘past the sandy cove, your lover lies, with a (hastily prepared) picnic, and a secret suprise’
It doesnt take me long, to find you and your feast. We finish our picnic, “So whats the secret treat” I ask as you smile, and you retrieve a box.
Inside there is a neclace, Engraved with ‘E+J’, and ‘I love you’ on the back. I’m sure that this love will bring me bliss till the end of my days.
“Hey you there! No, not you. You! With the green hair!” Janet takes notice of the TV. There is a sort of Circus Ringmaster pointing at her. She pauses the TV to process him. He looks almost human. He has a very large mouth and large eyes. His outfit is that of a ringmaster but his waist is inhumanely small. Most noticible of all are his hands. His fingers are ridiculously long, one of them is pointed toward janet. Janet is bewildered. “Jim! Come see this advert!” she yells. “be there in a second!” “How did he know that I have green hair.” she mutters to herself. She rewinds the advert. Its at this momet that Jim walks in. “He, said i have green hair Jim.” Jim looks confused and sits down. Janet presses play. “Hey you there! No, not you. You! With the green hair!” They look at each other and then back at the Tv. “You have just won a 50% off car!” The ring master says crossing his arms pleased. The camera pans over to a car. The car is as equally peculiar as the ringmaster. Its blue and looks like a citreon except the headlights extend of the car like wings. The car spins slowly to reveal that there are six wing mirrors. Each wheel has a hyper realistic human face on the covers with varied expressions. Jim and Janet both sit on the edge of their seats. The camera pans back to the ringmaster who is smiling widely. “This car is yours, greenie, for just 28 smakeroonies.” He lifts his arms up into the air and his fingers touch both top corners of the screen. The screen fades out to red and a phone number appears. “Well, should we call it?” Jim says pausing the TV.
Ashley enters the apartment in a flurry and drops her poorly packed bag where she stands. Her eyes dart around the room while her mind tries to retrace where he would have put them. Her eyes focus on the desk. She rips open the drawers and rummages through them but to no avail. “Shit,” she mutters under her breath while searching the clutter on the top of the desk. “Where the fuck are they?” this time with more desperation. Distressed, she stands back and closes her eyes. Her arms stay ridged as if she is still looking while she thinks. She opens her eyes scans the room right to left. She spots the usually empty fish bowl on a high shelf above the desk. Inside she sees her keys and phone. She is focused and reaches for them. She dries off her phone and puts it in her pocket while running to her bag and out the door and to the car lot.
I don’t want to look at you, But your eyes are magnetic, A brown, deep black hole aesthetic, I could fall into your eyes, You lure me in, but are apathetic.
Your eyes deepen to a gloomy black, You look through me. I know you could never like me back, I look away, as to not torture myself, I try to not love you, Your eyes are no help.
