“I bite the hand that feeds me, so that maybe it will let me starve.”

I can’t stand to let myself get help from others.

I just want to find my own solution.

Deep down in my heart I know I need help.

But it’s not as easy as asking for help.

Not everyone is made to help you with your deep dark thoughts.

You can’t just vent to anybody because that’s not polite.

So I’ve always said I’m better off by m...

(I promise I do not relate to this at all do not worry this is just trying to imagine how people who suffer with this feel)

I bite the hand that feeds me

So that maybe it will let me starve

Because if I don't starve

How do I get skinny

If I don't starve how do I avoid the comments

Nothing else will work

And if I eat I will grow

So I'll starve

Starve to become pretty

Because it seems pretty is ...

Self sabotage is a beautiful dance

A waltz, a tango, a ballroom romance

We fell in love on an October night

We became one to cure our own plight

Self sabotage tastes sweet on my teeth

I can taste her lipstick when she kisses me

It tastes like blood and cranberries

My pain fills her with energy

Self sabotage doesn’t care for me

She feeds me on rotting sweets

I bite the hand that feeds me

So maybe...

I dont want to drag anyone down with me

I’m angry, sure

But not that angry

Honestly, I’m just tired

Too tired.

I don’t sleep at night anymore

Because it’s the only time I have

Time

To just relax

And be.

I join too many clubs

And activities

And

I have too many ideas

And I’m done.

I’m done creating

Done destroying

Done setting my bridges on fire

And walking across them

Smiling.

I reject the arm...

I sit all alone just barely alive.

Only one thing allowing me to survive.

I bite the hand that feeds me, so that maybe it’ll let me starve.

Let me be.

Let me go.

Don’t feed the fire.

Maybe I’ll run away so that for you it won’t feel so hard....

I bite the hand that feeds me, so that maybe it’ll let me starve. These lines on my wrist just serve a daily reminder of last night. I hate these voice I want it to go away. I hate myself I want to float away…...

The coldness of the polished cell floor of seeps through my jeans.

The roof is glass so I can see the stars.

The columns of marble engorging me in this place.

I see Orion

And cancer

And Leo.

…

Enough about about this place!!!!!

I NEED FOOD!!!

But I can’t I keep forgetting about my plan…

I’ll bite the hand that feeds me so maybe I’ll starve.

I sit there and stare at my 26 plates of food

That...

I bite the hand that feeds me,

teeth sharp with pride and spite,

I’ll let them starve me slowly,

to feel the burn of fight.

Their kindness tastes like weakness,

and I refuse to bow,

I'd rather choke on nothing,

than bend and break somehow.

Let hunger be my master,

let emptiness consume,

I’ll feed on hollow echoes,

and starve beneath the moon.

For power's in the starving,...

I bite the hand that feeds me,

So that maybe it’ll let me starve.

On the other hand I’d like to see

The chicken and meat they carve.

Wondering whether I’ll eat the meal

My hunger has gone with the wind

I suppose I’ll beg and steal

It’s you that I’ll defend...

My palms lay upward in the air

Things offered taken for granted without a care

My tears fall further than gravity can pull

My sobs ring anyone morose into a soft lull

Knowing someone is like them in full

My mind wars, punishing myself for my never appreciation

I look in the mirror to ask “what is this creation?”

The clench in my heart yanks it down to my toes

As I see the people that give, and ...