They talk And oh crap, It’s me. They’re complaining again. All I can do is listen in.

Their voices beckon My sensitive ears Towards the door of the attic. I tiptoe, then attack.

I will not be the subject of petty gossip.

Moving into a new flat is always an interesting experience, you don’t know what the previous owner left behind or what type of person lived there prior to you. However, this particular flat didn’t have any of those problems, the problem this flat has is that the walls are paper thin. You can hear everything your neighbours are doing and saying, they could be cooking a recipe in their kitchen and reading it aloud and you’d be able to follow along in your kitchen too. This was a little irritating but something you could work with, if you had an iPad, you’d use earphones or headphones, if you had a TV, you’d have to play it on low volume or watch what your neighbours were watching so the TVs cancelled each other out. However, every cloud has a silver lining, and thus silver lining was bright. My neighbours upstairs were a little strange and antisocial and when they did interact, they weren’t exactly friendly, this was emphasised by them always watching murder documentaries and other dark TV shows. However, one day this came to a head, I was being very quite cleaning my house as my neighbours to my left had family over to visit. Then from nowhere I heard my upstairs neighbours talking, I stopped what I was doing and listened as I didn’t hear their conversations much. As they chatted their conversation got darker and darker and darker, and eventually they came out with a plan to commit a masa shooting at the local town centre, but they wants to keep it a secret. Wandering why they were so open, I realise they assumed I was out or at work as my flat was deadly silent and my other neighbours were fairly loud due to family visiting. These were the type of people you could see committing such a crime but to physically hear the plan be spoken right next door to you is more scary than the time itself. I didn’t know if anyone else had heard it but I had to report did to the police. These irritating and stress inducing walls, may have just saved countless lives.

I dragged a squeaky highlighter across my calendar, eyes focused and ears alert. A slow smile formed on my face as I listened to the new neighbors talk. They were planning a vacation to the Bahamas. Classy.

I scanned the list I’d copied with eager eyes, trying to see if I’d missed anything. They were leaving a key with another neighbor, (one who’s house I’d frequently gained access to) they’d be gone for a full fortnight , (perfect) and they, as I had newly learned, were leaving their valuables under a loose floorboard.

I leaned back and cracked my knuckles, chewing the tip of my pencil as I pondered my next move. All I really had to do was sneak in the other neighbor’s house, swipe the key, and I was rich.

The last couple had moved out due to a strange set of occurrences in the building. Lights would randomly cut off, phone lines would go down, the water would shut off…..definitely didn’t have anything to do with me.

Come midnight I was creeping along the dim hallway, knife ready and key in hand. I had to protect myself; these homeowners could be scary sometimes.

I stopped occasionally when I heard noises in the building, and finally I was outside of the apartment suite, key in hand. Now the fun began. I used my expertise in the field to slink around the apartment without so much as creasing the rug.

By noon the next day I was on my way to Las Vegas, five thousand dollars richer and the proud owner of a new car. What can I say? They left their keys too.

The house is pretty run down, but it was cheap. Mum doesn’t approve of the area obviously, “to many crimes,” “you’ll get robbed.” Yes mum that’s kinda the point. Mum doesn’t know about my job, I doubt she’d be very happy to find out her youngest son in thief. Robbie the eldest is a neurosurgeon (whatever that is), Chris runs his own radio station and has thousands of regular listeners, and Mike (that’ me) appears to be unemployed when is in fact an expert robber. What mum doesn’t know wouldn’t hurt her. My clothes are shoved into the wardrobe, the only thing I have in the kitchen is a loaf of bread and a coffee maker, and I’m yet to require sheets for my bed. It’s a work in progress. Very slow progress. It’s a flat in one of the most ugly apartment buildings I’ve ever laid eyes on, I thought Nickolas was going to refuse to move in when he saw it. Nickolas is my cat, a lazy thing but my only form of living contact seeing as I know absolutely no one who lives here. I also haven’t seen anyone else who lives in the apartment blocks, no one coming in with groceries, no one knocking on my door asking for a cup of sugar. Which is probably fortunate considering I couldn’t give them one. It’s a bit odd though, I feel like I’m the only person who actually lives here. The quiet suits me. Gives me space to think about my next heist. A small jewellers on the corner of Crows Row. It mostly just sells watches but they are very expensive watches, around £25,000 each. Would help me buy some proper furniture for this place and you know maybe some food. I love caffeine but I can only survive for so long on coffee and uncooked toast. I grab the blueprints of the jewellers off my kitchen counter and step outside on to the fire escape. I got the prints from the building contractors who redid the jewellers before it was a jewellers and was a tattoo parlour. Their archives are more poorly organised then their firewall is coded. It took me six minutes to hack it. I lean over the railing staring at the plans I hold in my hand, not the most complicated heist I’ve ever done. Disable the alarms and security cameras, throw in some some smoke canisters, smash the display cause, grab a few watches from their stands and bam no more living in an empty apartment. The watch stands seem to be all blocked together, rookie mistake, I can grab more that way. As I was thinking about how much time I should spend in the shop as to not seem suspicious, maybe even buy a small ring. But my thought process was cut short by a raised voice coming from above.

“No Rosa for the last God Damn time we are not smoking the place!” A male voice yells, they have a strong Scottish accent. I tilt my head up. The apartment above has their fire escape door open and were speaking about something I was pretty sure I wasn’t supposed to be hearing. “Why the Hell not it’s the safest way to get everyone out while remaining inconspicuous.” A female voice answers back, a strong Brooklyn accent… which makes sense seeing as we are in Brooklyn. “Come on Rick help me out here.” “I’m good thanks, I know better then to intrude on your little couple fights.” Another male voice, same Brooklyn accent. “We’re not a couple.” The Scottish voice again. A sharp edge, a topic better left untouched. “Oh as if your not dying to get your hands on me.” Says the girl, Rosa. A pause, I can feel the tense energy even from down here. I hear creaks, someone’s moving about. “We are not smoking the jewellers Rosa that’s my final decision, last word.” Says the Scottish accent. Wait jewellers as in the jewellers I’m about to rob, are they thief’s as well? A burst of rage suddenly screams from the room. “SERIOUSLY ARTHUR!!! Your gonna use a last word on something as stupid as a watch heist!” Screams Rosa. “Come on Arthur that’s a bit extreme don’t you think.” The male Brooklyn accent appears again, he hadn’t spoken in so long that I had forgotten he was even there. “Stay out of this Rick” Arthur says. “We used smoke bombs on our last job, if we use the exact same ones their going to make a connection and start looking for the same suspects.” There was some logic that I could see in Arthur’s explanation, Rosa couldn’t see it. “THEN WE’LL BUY SOME NEW GOD DAMN SMOKE BOMBS.”

More creaking floorboards. Someone steps out on to the fire escape a lit cigarette in their hands, they take a long drag before breathing out and tilting their head back. There wearing black baggy jeans and some sort of black T-shirt with a design on it but I can’t see it properly. They have blond hair that sticks up in every direction and I can’t help but make the assumption that this is Rick. Considering that the female and Scottish voice are still screaming at each other inside. A smashing comes from the room, rick grimaces and knocks his head down as the screaming continues. His cigarette still placed between his fingers. Our eyes lock. Rick is really cute. He tilts his head to the side and narrows his eyes, they then find the blueprints that are still in my hands he lets outa breathy laugh like he can’t believe what he’s seeing. He looks back to my eyes and gives me a teasing smile.

Without looking away from me he calls out behind him towards the screaming. “Hey guys?” No answer, he lets out a huff and turns quickly towards the inside of his apartment. “HEY GUYS!” The screaming comes to an abrupt stop. Having earned their attention he turns back to me and resumes talking, “you remember that new neighbour we got about a week back. Well I reckon we’ve been quite rude, time to say hello.” Sudden footsteps echo and suddenly another man stands on the fire escape, his pale fingers grasp the rail as he leans down to look at me, he has dark hair that’s cut short, I don’t think the hairstyle suits him. He’s wearing black slacks pants with a a plain white button up, pretty fancy. The gold rimmed glasses make him look very professional even though he can’t be older then 25. Anger coursed through his brown eyes behind the glass, even though I have never seen him I assumed that this was a constant thing. He doesn’t really seem like the type of guy to have fun. He sees the blueprints as well, his knuckles whiten and I think he might break the bar he’s gripping it so tightly. “Arthur meet the new owner of flat 3d” says Rick, he takes a another puff of his cigarette and blows it off to the side that Arthur is standing. He waves his hand through the air dispersing the smoke, while still glaring at me. “Who the fuck are you?” Arthur snarls.

“Didn’t you hear Rick? He’s the new owner of flat 3d.” A voice says behind me. I turn around quickly to be met with a girl, holding my cat. If her accent is anything to go by this must be Rosa. She’s got dark skin with braided hair, the occasional gold band running through them. She’s wearing a leather mini skirt and a white tank top, and lots of bracelet. “How’d you get in here?” I ask. From above me I hear Rick say something along the lines of ‘omg he speaks.’ “I picked the lock of course, I would have just come out onto the fire escape but you know… wearing a skirt… didn’t really wanna flash you.” She smiles while stroking Nickolas, that traitorous cat. I hear Arthur call down to her, “he’s got blueprints for the Crow Row job.” Rosa eyes say she’s surprised, but it looks like an act like she already knew. She laughs to herself as she lets Nickolas jump out her arms and slowly starts walking towards me. “You know” she starts. “When most people buy watches,” she’s right in front of me, taking the blueprints out of my hands. “They don’t go to the trouble of acquiring plans of the building.” She’s so close to me pushing me right up against the railing. She traces her hand along my jaw and smiles at me. “Now won’t you help me out here.” She leans into whisper in my ear. “Where did you get those blueprints.” I sidestep out of cage and grab the blueprints from her hands. “That would work better if you were guy, sorry seduction isn’t a great tactic with me.” I say straightening out the plans. Rosa lets out a huff and leans back against the railing.” Arthur, Rick get your asses down here!” She shouts up. Sudden footsteps clamber above and the outline of the two boys disappear from the fire escape.

“Sorry about the whole,” she waves her hands in a dismissive manner. “Honestly getting kinda sick of the whole pretty girl routine.” “Why do it then?” I ask. “It’s a good distraction.” She says sadly. “But honestly it doesn’t even work half the time, most guys now are gay or racist pigs.” I lean against the bar so I’m beside her. I take a bet and hope she doesn’t punch me. “I’m sure if you spoke to your boyfriend about it he’d find a different distraction.” She doesn’t punch me so that’s cool. But she dose freeze and stare at the floor. “Arthur isn’t my boyfriend.” Rosa says quietly. Like she doesn’t want to say it. I just shrug and start walking inside as I hear Rick and Arthur’s footsteps coming down the stairs, Rosa didn’t close the door behind her. “Could have fooled me.”

Arthur bursts into my apartment, Rick follows behind him seeming very unbothered about the whole ordeal. Arthur’s eyes scan from me, who is placing the blueprints down on my kitchen counter, to Rosa who is still looking glumly at her worn out black converses. He immediately turns on me stalking towards me. His hands are in a fist like he intends to punch me. Thankfully he doesn’t. Instead he just snarls at me and asks me who I am. “My names Mike.” “Last name?” He persists. I huff and roll my eyes. “Mike Lowen.” “Well Mikey would you mind telling us what your doing with the blueprints to the shop that we’re robbing?” Asks Rick, did he seriously just call me Mikey? “I think you mean the shop I’m robbing.” I counter, I see a hint of hesitation in Arthur’s eyes. Rosa whips her head that was currently facing Arthur to me, Rick raises his eyebrows in surprise. “Just you?” Rosa asks “Just me” I confirm. I’ve never tried working in a team, I’ve wanted to. But you can’t really go up to people, tell them your a thief, ask them if their a thief and then ask them if they want to help you steal something. “Can you get blueprints for any building?” Rick asks. I’m about to answer but before I can Arthur explodes (figuratively.) “Absolutely not Rick, he don’t need his help.” “I’m just saying dude, a talent like that could be helpful.” “We don’t even know him!”

Rosa walks over to me and hops up onto the kitchen counter with her legs dangling over the edge. She picks up the plans and looks at them. I walk over to her. Arthur and Rick are so caught up in screaming that they don’t notice me hoping up on the counter beside her. “What are they fighting about?” I ask. “Whether you should help us on the job or not.” She says. Rosa says it like it’s no big deal but to me this is like the coolest thing ever. “Yea, having blueprints like this could be hella useful.” She says again eyeing the plans in her hands. “I don’t just do blueprints you know I can do security tapes, get you fake Documents.” “Ricks the fake ID guy but we need someone for the tech stuff.” “If Rick is the fake ID guy what are you and Arthur?” “Well I’m the distraction as we have already been over, and Arthur’s the plan guy. All of us go in though, we are all physically able for running and shit like that.” “I could be your tech guy.” I say. Holy shit this is it, well at least I hope it is. I’m not going to become part of a gang thing. Besides there’s safety in numbers less likely to get caught. And every great spy movie has a team of thieves instead of just one guy. But that might just be the movie business, no one wants to watch one person rob a bank by themselves. There’s no interaction, boring! Rosa looks up from her plans and looks at me with a startled look that quickly turns into happiness. She snaps her head around to face the boys in my apartment that are screaming at each other. “SHUT IT!” She yells. Both boys turn to face her a startled look on their face obviously hopping for a few more minutes of screaming. “Mike’s joining out heist, and future heists. Final word.”

I have no idea what the whole final word is but Rick and Arthur have very different reactions to this. A very angry string of curse from Arthur and a smug laugh from Rick directed at Arthur. “You can’t last word something like this Rosa!” Arthur defends, I find it quite concerning how desperate he is to keep me out of this. Oh well that only makes me want to define him more. I can tell I’m gonna love pissing him off. “Dude you literally used a last word like ten minutes ago.” Rick laughs. That seems to put Arthur at a lose for words. Which gave Rosa the opportunity she needed to cut him off. She jumped off the counter and walked towards him. She traced his chest with her hands and smiled up at him. “A smart guy like you should know that this is a win for us.” She says wrapping her arms around his neck and pushing against him. One hands takes his glasses off while the other strokes his neck. Arthur keeps his hands firmly at his sides, but his fingers twitch he wants to touch her. To hold her. “Don’t you want to make me happy darling?” Honestly I understand why she plays the distraction. Feeling suddenly really awkward I look past them to Rick. He’s already looking at me. He takes a breath of his cigarette while still holding eye contact. He looks me up and down as he exhales and I feel myself blush and tense up. At some point Arthur has pushed away from Rosa, or she let him go, I wasn’t paying attention to them. “The only reason you want him on the team is to piss me off” Arthur tells her. And turning to Rick he accuses him as well. “And you only want him cause you think he’s cute.” I blush again. “Yea” says Rick. “That and blueprints would be hella helpful on jobs.” “Also he’s quite sweet.” Adds Rosa who has walked back over to me and taken the prints. She nods her head towards the door. “Come on we’ll show up around the apartment.”

Fucking awesome.

I’m not actually Frank. I’m Francesca. But my customers call me Frank because my great-grandpa opened this place and passed it down to my grandpa, then my dad, then me. There were no sons to carry it on, so I did. Franks’s Diner, just outside Old City Philadelphia.

So many stories pass through my doors.

I get lots of the same customers. On Thursday the special is spanakopita with a Greek salad and pita bread. Some folks only come for that.

Elly comes every Thursday. She is lovely, with her long hair in a bun and adorable cats eye glasses. We flirt as I serve her but I doubt she’s actually interested in a woman with an acid scar. I’ve since given up on love.

One day she asks for advice. I sit down and watch the other wait staff bustle about.

“It’s my upstairs neighbors,” she said. “I think they’re going to kill each other one day.”

I widen my eyes.

“Thing is, when I see them any other time, they are totally in love. Happy. Radiant, even. Then at night, around 7 pm, upstairs, they go at it. Always the same argument!”

Next Thursday I asked how the neighbors were. It was a busy day but I needed to know.

“I’m so embarrassed.” Elly confessed. “I finally asked them about the arguing.”

“Let me serve these platters first, I want to know!”

Three orders of Spinach pie, salad, and pita. One order with anchovies. My gloved hand placed the tiny oily fishes in an X design. I scooted the platters to the end of the counter.

“Well?”

“It’s ridiculous of course,” Elly sighed, poking her pie with a fork.

“What??”

“They’re both actors. Rehearsing lines. We laughed about it.”

“Well that explains it all!”

Elly pulled two pieces of paper out of her purse.

“They gave me two tickets to the show tomorrow night,” she said. “Wanna go with me?”

The front door banged open. With armfuls of groceries, Natty hurried inside and nudged the door closed with her right foot. Pyewacket threaded between her legs as she unloaded her milk, bread, and eggs. “This isn’t helping me go faster,” Natty said as she took off her raincoat and searched her pockets and purse for her favorite scarf, a silk print of Klimt’s The Kiss. The Siamese caterwauled in counterpoint. Conceding, Natty opened a can of Blue Buffalo. She retraced her steps over a pot of tomato soup and grilled munster sandwiches. With a thick quilt and a handful of throw pillows, the corner of her bedroom is made ready. During the pandemic, Natty had gone through a library of audiobooks. Next she dipped her toe in a river of podcasts. But a few weeks ago when she was cleaning out her closet for donations Natty heard voices. Above her unworn but too nice to let go party dress was a small metal grate in the ceiling. Each night starting around eight pm, words rained down from the apartment directly over hers. The Spinster Innes discovered bodies at the foot of staircase and uncovered the Armstrong’s blackmail. Next Iris must locate her missing new companion Miss Troy on a speeding train of suspicious characters. Some nights until around ten, some nights longer plot twisted from above. Last night, Natty has fallen asleep over a bowl of chips the trials and tribulations of the illustrious Tyler family. Now she listened for the latest story. Above Ira traced his fingers across his generous bookshelves. Mary Rinehart Roberts, Ethel Lina White, Charlotte Armstrong, his hand marched over thrillers as he considered tonight’s read. Since losing Amanda, Ira couldn’t sleep unless he read out loud. He needed to hear words any words reverberate off his walls and lull him to sleep. Lately it had been a little easier. Ira felt as if he was sharing a book and dinner with someone special. Then he caught sight of the golden silk scarf he had found on the sidewalk in front of his building. Slender rectangles of goldenrod and bronze, teal and cadium red, two lovers embracing, shimmered from his coat stand. Ira looked for a Clutch of Constables, the Ngaio Marsh mysery featuring an artist and her husband a Detective Inspector. He touched the novel and somewhere below his apartment a Siamese meowed loudly. With a laugh, Ira took that for approval. Natty dipped her grilled cheese into her soup. The warm sounds of artist Agatha Troy on an inland cruise to murder began to filter down and settle down around her. Pyewacket nestled on Natty’s toes as the mystery unfolded.

I think I’m really starting to hate this place. The first few days were ok, peaceful and calm. But recently I don’t know, my neighbor upstairs has this guest over since 3 days ago and they’re like parakeets, they don’t shut up. But I kind of don’t hate it because whatever it is that their planning sounds kinda fun. Except they’ve been training martial arts or fighting or something because eventually you hear a thump or crash here and there.

Tonight, was quieter than usual, but since I’m right under the vent I could hear it crispy clear. “If we’re able to pull this off, man it will be the biggest heist of the year!” I’m already antsy man.” That was my neighbors voice. But he never looked like the type to… “all this practice and planning better be worth it! I can’t wait but at the same time I can, i don’t know man I’m starting to feel nervous…since the other dude left us were kind of in a tight spot. We needed him for the plan! And what if he rats us out?” I can hear his guest talking in a hushed and anxious tone. “Don’t worry man, we’ve never done something like this without him, sure but I’m pretty positive we can pull it off, we don’t need him anyway.” My neighbor tries reassuring him.

I know I could be targeted for this but. I walk out my balcony and look around, great no one in sight. I struggle to climb up to their balcony , “man I need to workout more.”

Tap, tap. Someone comes out of a room and looks at the front door so I tap on the balcony glass door in the back. Tap, tap. They look at me confused and in shock, I wave. Im pretty sure I don’t look like a threat or thief because instead of calling the police he calls over to my neighbor, who emerges from the room immediately.

He opens the sliding balcony door. “What in the-“. “You know,” I cut him off, “you guys talk really loud.” They look at each other worried, I contemplate my next words. “And I want to be- I mean I can be your other left hand man, I mean woman, you know since Im a girl and um I have some experience computer wise and all.” I chuckle awkwardly, waiting for a reply hoping it’s not bad. They honestly don’t look shocked which confuses me I thought they’d poop their pants. Wait does that mean they’re gonna get rid of me? Uh oh. My neighbor sighs in relief, nudging his friend. “I told u man, now u owe me 10 bucks.” They begin laughing a bit. Now I’m the shocked one.

“We were speaking loudly on purpose,” my neighbor begins, “since I know you’re a really good tech and all I was hoping you would over hear and become interested and ask.” The guest adds “And since you told him you also like action movies and stuff maybe you’d want to be in a real one.” My eyes shine, not of tears but of excitement. “When can I start helping?” I ask. “Tonight.” “We should get some coffee because it’s gonna be a while to teach you the plan.” My neighbor says to me, motioning to the kitchen. “Don’t bother, for me I mean. Cus I already heard all your plan , y’know from my room.” He chuckles. “You really think we would use the same plan? No, we had to see if you weren’t gonna rat us out first or something.” Ah. “Mm, fair point. Fine just add some French vanilla please.” “Yes ma’am.”

Man, it’s gonna be a long night.

I was carrying the last box into my bedroom when I heard the footsteps from above my head. I'd heard the walls in these places were thin, but this took the mick. I could hear every thump, every bump. It was clear I wasn’t going to get any sleep that night.

As I was tucking myself into my new bed, I heard whispering coming from the room above me. Being the nosey Parker I am, I couldn't help, but stand on my bed and raise an ear to the ceiling. What I heard would change my perspective on humanity altogether.

“I heard this is their first home Marvin, we have to do something for them!!!” One person said to the other.

“What do you want to do? Get everyone together and throw a party?” Said Marvin.

“That’s a fantastic idea!!!”

“Mandy I was joking…”

“We’re doing it Marv!!!”

That Saturday as I got in from work, Mandy pulled me to one side and asked me to follow her into the community garden. I followed her and saw all my new neighbours standing around a giant banner saying ‘Welcome Neighbour’ I burst into tears on the spot. I don’t know how they’d heard about my parents kicking me out, but they all came together to welcome me. This is my family now, and I couldn’t be happier.

After losing my job I decided moving would be a better option for me, a small flat with bland white walls, and an unusual aroma. I slumped onto the dusty brown coach, and closed my eyes. I was nearly asleep when I began to hear clattering upstairs. ‘I just had to choose a flat with a rented out upstairs,’ I thought to myself, and I listened intently to the action upstairs. “What if we just dump if in the river?” A woman asked, “It’d make this whole thing easier.” “Dump it in the river?” A man exclaimed, “Are you trying to get us caught! We should bury the body in the grass, but let’s place a dead animal above it.” “An unfashionable idea to me,” A younger man said, “I think we should send the body to the police, dressed up nicely with a little note. We need to do things with stlye.” ‘What the hell is happening up there?” I thought to myself. I continued to listen to their conversation. “We’re not dressing up a corpse,” said the older man, “And we do not need to send a letter to the police either! We’re not supervillains in a movie, nor are we Jack the ripper.” “Let’s assume our victim is a man,” The woman said, “I am not doing a bunch of heavy lifting! If the victim is a man, then you have to carry his body.” “Ah shucks!” The young man yelled, “I don’t want to carry the body! You’re going to, and I’ll dress him up!” “I already said we’re not dressing up a corpse,” Said the older man, “I’ll can carry the body, since you’re too weak to do it.” “Weak! I am not weak! I just care about the smell that will ruin my clothing. That stuff is expensive and valuable!” “When should we strike?” The woman asked. “Tonight, when the renter downstairs sleeps we will kill them,” My eyes went wide, the victim they were talking about was me. I got off of my couch, and went into the bathroom, locking the door behind me. I sat in the bathtub, and debated calling the cops. ‘I don’t have evidence,” I thought, and I waited, ‘If I bait them inside, the cops can catch them in the act.” A few hours later, and my front door creaked open. I heard soft footsteps walked past the bathroom door and into the bedroom. The footsteps went back and abruptly stopped in front of the bathroom door. My heart thumped inside of my heart, sweat rolled down the side of my face, and my lip quivered. I held my knees close to my chest, and buried my face into my knees. My hands shook as I grabbed my phone, and dialed 911. I whispered into my phone, “Someone’s in my house, and I can’t say much or they’re hear me,” I silenced my phone immediately and waited for the cop sirens. “Where are they?” The Woman asked, “They’re not even here! Did you check the move in date?” “I did!” The young man said, “I’m not stupid, ok? They were supposed to move in today.” “Keep looking,” The older man ordered. After a few minutes they group came back together in front of the bathroom, and one of them rattled the doorknob. I heard a bang against the door that made my heart drop. Another bang and then another, but then the sound of sirens. I smiled as I heard the group run away, as the sirens got louder. ‘I’m moving from this place right away.’

The first night in my new flat, I lay in my bed. I struggled to quiet my brain, and the thin walls around me didn’t help. I shuffled around and closed my eyes in the hope of relaxing, but it was in vain. My mattress was too springy, my pillow was lumpy. I missed the soft chatter of my old roommates at night. I imagined I could hear them on the other side of the wall. Wait. No, that wasn’t my imagination. Those were actual people talking in the room above me. I opened my eyes and focused on the ceiling, as if that would help me hear their conversation. At first I could only hear quiet murmuring, but as they talked, their voices rose. “Yes! And maybe we could do little things that are noticeable but not obvious!” “Good idea. Should it be spread out on different days or all on the same?” “Maybe all on the same, ‘cause then he could guess what it is. But we’d need some kind of distraction…” “We could ask his roommate to take him out for the day?” “Maybe… but will he be suspicious? We don’t want him guessing before he gets back.” “You’re right. Well, lets sleep on it. We have time.” “Okay, goodnight!” “Goodnight.” I listened for a minute more, but they were quiet. I considered what I had heard. Who were they talking about? What were they planning? I pondered these questions for a while, but then I realized that I probably shouldn’t have listened to their conversation. Oops. I assured myself it didn’t matter, because I could finally fall asleep.

The next evening, I did laundry. I gathered my clothes into my basket, walked out of my bedroom and down the hall. The walls were painted a shade of green that I imagined would have looked nice if there hadn’t been water stains. I sighed. This wasn’t ideal, but at least it was something. I bumped every single wall on the way down to the laundry room. That would take some practice. I shoved all my laundry in, with the soap on top, and started the machine. On my way back up, my slides flopped on the stairs as I took out my phone to start a timer. Preoccupied with scrolling through the numbers, I didn’t see the other person until it was too late. We bumped shoulders and stumbled, struggling to retain our balance. Eventually we succeeded and looked up at each other. “I’m so sorry, I was looking at my phone!” I apologized immediately. “No worries, I was too.” They laughed lightheartedly. “Did you just move in?” “Yeah, yesterday. I’m Clover, she/her. Nice to meet you.” I waved. They waved back and said, “Awesome! I’m Ash, they/them. Are you liking it so far?” “It’s nice,” I responded, putting my phone back in my pocket. “Kinda hard to get used to, but that’s normal.” “Yep! Takes a bit of time, but I’ve come to think of it as home. I hope you will too, we’ll be glad to have a new flatmate!” It was then that I realized they must have been the enthusiastic person from last night. “Hey, I know this isn’t a great first impression, but I couldn’t help overhearing your conversation last night. What were you talking about?” The weirdness of the question only sunk in after I said the words, so I added as an afterthought, “I’m sorry, that was rude and personal. Don’t feel like you have to answer that.” “Oh, I was just talking to my partner,” They laughed and shook their head. “We’re planning a surprise birthday present for our friend, Warren. It’s gonna be funny because he loves mystery novels and TV shows, so we’re going to attempt to do something that’ll make it seem like he’s the main character in one.” They seemed super excited about it, but what caught my attention was their friend. A guy named Warren who liked mystery novels and TV shows? How common was that? I smiled. “That sounds fun. I have a friend named Warren who also likes mystery!” “Wow, what a coincidence!”

A week later, I found out that it was in fact, the same Warren. Another week, and I was helping them plan the present. Three weeks later, we set the trap. It was successful, but he guessed it far faster than we had anticipated. He still loved it though, and it was nice to see him again.