“Hold up! I see something, gimme a minute."

"What are you— WOAH AVERY, NO—"

The maniac proceeded to step on my shoulder. Does she even realize she’s like what? A hundred pounds? Why did I think it was a good idea to clean the attic together?

"Relax, Alex. I’ll be fine" She put her another foot, squatting on my shoulders.

"But I’m not!" I squirmed, "You know you’re quite heavy, don’t you?"

"...

Friend

A word that’s already finished

What a funny conduit

A consummate of cosplaying

Connection as Accomplishment

If your able to collaborate

With your friend you will congregate

To put a label on your fable

A tag to legitimize your con

Created in credit

On an account thats indebted

Tip the table on your friend

To make conversation for leverage

Until your latter dominance

Brings ou...

People piss me off.

I’ve made excuses for other people for so long.

I’m done with that.

I’m done with hating myself for the way that I feel.

I am entitled to hate whoever I want to.

Especially when it’s fucking justified.

I am done.

I am done with guilting myself,

With gaslighting myself,

With lying to myself.

I am done protecting her.

She doesn’t need a shield.

She uses people as them anyways.

L...

I hate you.

I think I hate you more than my body can handle.

I want to destroy you.

Then I want to forget you.

But I want to destroy you first.

I feel guilty for that,

Until I don’t.

I think I’m tired of feeling guilty.

You are the villain in this story after all.

Will I ever stop being angry?

It’s not like you can change.

Some people just are the way that they are.

You will never have my forgiv...

Why are you so nice to me?

I thought to myself

When my friend’s show that they care

Like everyone else

Why do I doubt

And why was I shy?

When there are no lies

between their eyes

Not hidden beneath

Like the dirt that’s under their feet

Unlike the soil

I had once longed to meet

No more do I keep score

Of story telling lore

Trying to one up each other

that’s not very mature

And secrets we ke...

I miss her sometimes.

She was a good friend.

We were there for each other in the hard times.

We only knew each other in the hard times.

It’s easy to bond over that.

But I don’t think we would’ve needed it.

But she was so sweet and kind

And easy to talk to.

We bonded over Olivia Rodrigo.

I taught her how to make paper cranes

And she made an army to rival my own.

I made her a particularly special on...

I know I’m just being paranoid,

But it’s been a full day,

No responses,

Not even to say “No, sorry”

And that’s not like them.

What happened at that party?

I wasn’t able to come.

Did something change?

Did they all come to the realisation that they hate me?

Is this how it ends?

So quick,

So suddenly?

What did I do?

Was it nothing,

Was it everything?

Is this the end?

How did we get here so fast?

I te...

My friends chose me.

Isn’t that crazy?

Isn’t it crazy that they care for me?

Sometimes I can hardly believe it.

And they love me.

They don’t judge me.

Isn’t that kind of weird?

Suspicious?

It’s not.

That’s the crazy part.

I can be myself around them.

I can trust them.

And it’s sad that this is new for me,

That I haven’t known the feeling in a while.

But it’s not weird that I’m happy.

It’s not wei...

I don’t feel secure,

Or safe in most of my relationships.

With my good friends or even my best friends,

Everything feels viable to change.

My trust could always be misplaced.

It’s hard to have any faith.

They may not like me

As much as I think they do.

Or love me the way I love them.

I’m a hazard to myself.

I can’t read between the lines,

I can’t even see the lines anymore.

My intuition is blind....

I thought I could trust you.

Can I trust you?

Why did you ask me that?

Do you really think I would?

I thought you liked me.

Do you just think I’m a creep?

Maybe I’m spiraling.

But am I spiraling?

There isn’t a lot there to interpret,

You said what you said.

Were you joking?

It didn’t sound like you were joking.

But if you weren’t joking,

Why would you say that?

I thought we were getting closer

And...